h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Last night I had to go to the centre, as a further investigation into my health.

I was to be at the by 20:30, which I duly was, and then was invited into the unit, where the necessary forms were filled in, and an explanation of the procedure explained. There were two of us in for last night, that being the number of cubicles available. There was also the Consultant who was conducting the study, who would be with us all night, in a locked secure environment.

I was directed to my cubicle and made to feel comfortable... luckily there was a television there, so I watched Life in Cold Blood until 22:00, when the Consultant came through, and ran me through the procedure in detail.

It involved having a heartbeat monitor mounted on my finger, another measure on my ear, a strap across my chest and another across my stomach to measure inhalation and exhalation, and a tube placed in my nostrils to record exhalation of Carbon Monoxide. The room also had infrared camera and microphone surveillance. I was advised to settle for before 00:00, so I sat watching 'Van Helsing' until the appointed time. The Consultant came in to 'wire' me up and check everything was working, switched the light out and left me to my own devices...

Now came the part I was ... are not the in the and this was no exception. I don't know why, but I was expecting a soundproof, or at least damped, room to aid ... No such The lifts sounded like Cyclones, the Consultant appeared to be banging around all night. The toilet for the Geriatric ward was right by my headboard, and I was obliged to provide six hours solid sleep. Not surprisingly I managed nil, zero, zilch... Then came the fun part. The blood test... So far, to paraphrase Tony Hancock, I've given at least an armful already. So this would be a doddle... except it is taken from the wrist. It has to come from an artery, which is slap bang in the centre of the wrist! So a male came in at 06:30 with a long needle, and a very pleasant bedside manner, to take this blood. He warned me it would hurt. Hurt? Now I know how JC felt when the nails went in. After five minutes slowly sliding the needle in, he gave up on that spot, and moved a little further up the wrist and tried again. Another five minutes and still no joy, and usually I'm a good little Bleeder, but not this time. Tried the other wrist and eventually he struck oil... well Blood. Now both wrists ache like and I'm wondering what the bruises will be like.

I just hope I don't have to redo it, as I didn't actually so may not have provided the information they wanted.

If I do, I am certainly wearing earplugs, and taking a quantity of

Just wait for the next appointment now!!!

MMF

ast night I had to go to the centre, as a further investigation into my health.

Oh my, I'm
Sounds as awful as I was afraid it would be.

Sorry to hear that MMF

If you had slept, they'd have charged you single room rate I suppose.

Hope things sort themselves out soon - that sounds like a horrible experience. Go have a few

Stocking up big s for you, MMF

Thanks folks.

I knew that the aspect might be tough... After all, it is a so they like it to be as warm as which didn't help, and it probably wasn't noisy, as I explained on the exit questionnaire, it was just that the noises were unusual so just as I was about to doze off, something would wake me again.

At least the next appointment should be more straight forward. Just blowing into a bag!

Let's just hope I don't have to repeat it.

At least it wasn't the Lumbar Punch!

*Thinks! I wonder when that is due!!! *



and as suitable!

MMF

blimey

I think my verbage was a little stronger than that, Sho, at 06:30 this morning... but it will do...

If the blood-letting hadn't been so painful I'd have ! Poor was trying to be so gentle and was so apologetic! I really felt for him...
And thanks Sho! Hope that dispelled the

Believe it or not, I am actually about the whole thing as we speak.. I just thought it could only happen to me!!!



MMF

Awww - that sounds definitely more than unpleasant! Wouldn't want to be the poor , he must get cursed at a lot

At least you have it behind you and won't have to dread it anymore!

Sounds absolutely brutal..yes,a few are in order..with further exams..

I don't have such trouble ..... but I can sympathise with you.

Thanks friends or as preferred

I just don't believe my

After months of complaining how the have ground up our road, so that it resembles the Great Lakes in a downpour. They are retarmacking it now... tonight... as I speak...


That is all I can hear!



Of all nights!!!

I JUST WANT TO GO TO FOR sake!!!

I give up...

At least my wrists are

They are Beautiful now...



Good night all...

To , Perchance to that is the



MMF

sounds like they're all out to get you!

Wrap a around your head to block the noise.

And sleep well regardless

Oh dear, that does sound awful. I hope you manage to get some good sleep after all that.

Poor MMF

- as I always say, it's much funnier to put needles into someone else, than to have them inserted into your own body.

Oh, I don't know, I can't imagine sticking needles into people is much fun either - it was bad enough the few times I had to help vaccinate the sheep and cats

And when I was in hospital in December there was a medical student there who was supposed to take a blood sample - the poor guy's hands were shaking and he nearly burst into tears about how badly he was doing it, I had to tell *him* jokes to calm him down!

But they have to learn somehow

Humans usually don't bite while you put needles into them, animals might

Especially cats. Five of the six ends are pointy!

The sheep are too stupid to notice what's going on Though it was having sheep that put me off wanting to be a vet.

Uh-oh, topic drift.

>>Humans usually don't bite while you put needles into them, animals might<<

In my line of wo*k, being bitten is a distinct possibility - though the fact that I hold the sharp pointy things usually acts as a deterrent

Sorry for the topic-drift, MMF - hope you're feeling a bit better and getting some sleep.