h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"...like a marauding army of kleptomaniacal showgirls, said Davis, using clockwork precision and brute force to satisfy high-end boutique needs."
*****

http://www.neworleanscitybusiness.com/uptotheminute.cfm?recid=4912&userID=0&referer=dailyUpdate


A story of a tranny streetgang, terrorizing New Orleans.
And, I'm pretty sure, my new favorite news article of all time.

*****
"They’ll make themselves scarce for a few weeks and then one day you’ll be busy with a customer and all of a sudden there’s a whole slew of them in your store and there’s nothing you can do because you’re there by yourself,"
*****

It's like something Anthony Burgess (A Clockwork Orange) dreamed up while on a meth-streak, but then discarded, because it seemed just too far-fetched.

*****
"The transvestites, Ogle said, appear to be drug-addicted and fearless in their lust for designer shoes, jackets and jewelry."
*****

I can't stop reading this. It's like something The Onion would come up with, but as a joke. What now, Onion?! You've been bested by real life.

*****
"I haven’t seen them in at least a week but they’ll be back. They’re never gone for long."
*****

Amazing. My whole world is just... wow.

...wow.

I'm just praying that Hollywood doesn't drop the ball on this one.
Showgirls II...

At last, Paul Verhoeven will get his chance...

"Next door at Winky’s, Bonga heard people screaming inside Vegas, then saw a blur of cheap wigs and masculine legs in designer shoes streak past her door."

...never say die, New Orleans.

There's really only a couple places on earth I can imagine something like this happening, and along with Las Vegas and Bangkok, I'd've thought pre-Katrina New Orleans.

They sure have made a comeback, though. Good on them.