h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*brings in her comphy chair and a good book to curl up with in front of the fire whilst sitting this page then begins to look about the room*...."my oh my, this is an interesting page now isn't it?, might not be in need of this book i brought, looks as if i can find plenty to satisfy me here amongst these threads" ......
*starts to look about for a bit before returning to her comphy chair by the fire*........
the pagesitter

*notices something small and furry in her chair by the fire*...."my!, you startled me!!, what are you anyway???
*small furry creature begins to speak*,"why i am a fuberbitran and my name is franchesca, i am sorry to of disturbed you but well you see i am lonely and just wanted some company".....
*looks at the cute little critter and can't help but smile*,"i see, so what would you like to do franchesca?"....
*franchesca thinks for a moment then her eyes light up brightly*, "would you?, could you?, possibly tell me a story???, i do so love stories "
*the pagesitter ponders for just a moment then speaks*, "why yes!, i can do that ", "here, hop up into my lap and i will begin to tell you the tale of two frogs, how does that sound?"
franchesca: "that sounds GREAT!!!"...*hops up into the pagesitters lap and settles in for a story*....
pagesitter: "well, it starts off like any other story does with.....once upon a time in a land far far away.......".............
the pagesitter

there live two of the most ordinary little froggys you have ever seen. they lived in an ordinary little pond and sat on ordinary little lily pads catching ordinary bugs with their ordinary tongues.
franchesca: this does not sound like a very good story, i mean stories aren't supposed to be full of ordinary stuff.....
the pagesitter: just listen to the story and see what happens
franchesca: but it won't be anygood if everything is ordinary
the pagesitter: do you want me to tell this story or not??
franchesca: ok, tell the story.....
the pagesitter: good then, here we go....
they were happy little frogs content to live out their ordinary lives without any unexpected excitement, little did they know that was all about to change for on this ordinary day while they sat on their ordinary pads in their ordinary pond eating ordinary bugs with their ordinary tongues something completely out of the ordinary was about to happen....................
the pagesitter

*all of a sudden from out of nowhere a beautiful dragonfly appeared*"why hello there you ordinary froggies , my but this looks like the perfect spot for me to do my stuff ...by the way, what are your names??"
*the frogs looks at each other for a moment a bit perplexed then look back towards the dragonfly and begin to speak*
"I am george and this is tina, who are you???"
"why i am monique and i have come to liven up your ordinary lives "
*with that monique began to flitter to and fro at a frantic pace leaving the two ordinary frogs to look on in complete confusion*
monique: now, the first thing we must do is add a little color to this pond like so..........
*with a flutter of her wings the flowers begin to bloom blossoms of the deapest red you have ever seen and the water begins to ripple and turn to the clearest blue like the blue of a spring afternoons sky*

*goerge and tina look on in complete amazement as monique transforms their ordinary little lives into something extrodinary*
monique: there that's much better isn't it?? now all we need to do is work on the two of you
tina: what do you mean? what is wrong with us??
monique: just look at you both, sitting there in yesterdays style why it is a crime to look like that while surrounded by this.
*with a wave of her tail tina and george are suddenly decked out in the finest of garb suitable for royalty*
*george and tina look at each other in disbelief for they had never been so well dressed before*
monique: now you are ready for your new lives , let's start by inviting a few friends over for a party
*within minutes their little pond was filled with people some of whom they never recalled meeting before, all eating, drinking and dancing about while chatting with them like they were the best of friends*
at first tina and george enjoyed all the attention they were receiving but after a time they began to long for peace and quite. they looked over at monique and asked when everyone was leaving, monique looked puzzled at this and wanted to know why they wanted to know something like that. weren't they enjoying themselves so much more now that they were not so ordinary?? tina and george said that it was kind of nice for awhile to dress up and decorate their home so that it was as lovely as it was but they just did not feel comfortable and wanted to be able to sit and relax for a bit as well. they told monique that dressed as they were and surrounded by such rich and beautiful things they were too nervous to relax, could they not for just a bit go back to the way they were so they might rest........

Oh please go on... this is lovely!!!!

(Oh and thanks for minding the place while I was away! You've kept it very tidy!)

*looks up from her book and slowly removes here specticals*
well hello there nice to see you again.......
*looks down and notices her little friend has fallen asleep*
would you mind helping me get franchesca here into bed, it seems my reading has tuckered her out ...........
monsy

Poor little sprite... here you go.
*picks her up and takes her to the bedroom*
*comes back out*
Now finish the story!!!

"my but you are as bad as Franchesca!! LOL!!, we must wait for her to wake up before finishing the story or she will be quite upset with me ...do not fret though, she will be awake soon i am sure
monsy

What shall we do to pass the itme away eh?
(I know I know.... that's a set up line waiting for a punchline to happen! )

we could always dance naked on the tables but then that might be more excitement than we could stand so how about a game of twister instead??
monsy

naked?

that might cause a few heads to turn
monsy

I'm sure it might. I'll get the oil then?

and i got the feathers
wonder how long the little sprite will be asleep and if she is a sound sleeper??
monsy

LOL You obviously have kids for those questions to come into your head immediately. I wouldn't think of that until it was too late!

LOL!! kids and lots of experience
picture that perfect moment just to the point of "pure joy" and a 2 year old who has just learned to open doors walks in and asks what you are doing LOL!!
monsy

I've been there actually

My girlfriend at the time was horrified but all I could do was burst out laughing. Which one of us do YOU think was the parent of the child?

actually, i may be wrong here but with my attitude i would say that you were the parent
but, beings as i am not like everyone else then most likely she was the parent
monsy

LOL Your assumptions were correct. At present I'm an offspring free zone.