h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well I'm about to finish my first year at university, and what have I learned? That Descartes is 'cogito, ergo sum'; Locke is 'tabula rasa'; Berkeley is 'esse is percipi'; that I can take Southern Comfort but not wine; that I hate learning French but love Philosophy, hence an impending course change; that irony can be applied to most situations; and that yes, despite popular opinion, I can survive on my own.

So as I leave the hallowed halls of Hatfield until October I will carry with me the knowledge that it's fun to be put on top of a vending machine by one's friends. But 'trophying' roadsigns is a task fraught with danger and is to be studiously avoided.

And so to work, I cry. Factory work awaits me as I take the A1M and A59 back home. Three months of labour in order to finance my second year of study at the University of Durham. As to what pleasures await me when I arrive back in Durham, who knows? But pleasures they are sure to be. It's not 'goodbye', sweet Durham, it's only 'au revoir'.