h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Thanks to this supermarket-related outburst:

“You see, it’s called the crisp aisle. But a Wotsit, right, that’s not a crisp – that’s a corn-based snack food. Skips? What the **** are they? They’re not crisps but they’re in the crisp aisle. Pringles? I don’t even think they count. A crisp is a single slice of deep fried potato, Pringles are reconstituted potato, that’s why they’re a uniform shape. I swear, if they locked me in a supermarket they’d find me in the “Crisp” aisle, with a packet of Wotsits in one hand and Skips in the other. Sobbing. Sobbing like a little child… What?”

They may have a point.

I don't see what's so funny!

Now wait: you've been working there since August last year and they noticed only today?

I went shopping with Lainey a year or so ago, and ended up protesting very loudly that the sugar should not damn well be in the baking section when I don't use it for baking, I put it in my tea. She usually goes on her own now.

I wish L would go shopping on her own...

The only grocery store embarrassment I've ever had involved a tube of K-Y Jelly and a small child with an inquisitive nature and a very loud voice.

I don't know what Wotsits are, but most stores refer to the aisle where the Pringles and chips/crisps are as the "snacks" aisle. Would that ease your pain any?

That's fine, that makes sense.

I wasn't aware that Pringles were reconstituted. Not that I ever eat them, but I'd never thought about how they got to look that way. I wonder if Munchos are as well. Not that I eat those, either. I don't care for crisps/chips at all.

This has been a very enlightening journal entry.

See, before this you were all happily snacking away without thinking of the consequences. You know what shaped potato "crisps/chips" are made of? Dough. Yeah, like bread. That's not a crisp. That is to a crisp what a collage made from old magazines is to the International Photographer of the Year's number one photograph.

Or something.

I like Nik-Naks.

B

Wasn't he a character in James Bond?

Aah! I like HIM even more.

B

Nik-naks are great, in a corn snack sort of way.