h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have great news...well i think its great

I've been watching the newts in my pond for a couple of months now. The large handsome male, with his dark spots and bright orange belly - has been chasing the females round the pond for weeks. There are several females and a couple of immature newts. They are 'smooth newts' which are far more common than the 'palmate' and 'great crested' newts. All our native newts are protected, so its an honour to have them in my garden - where i know they will be safe.
Anyway the good news is - today i saw several newtlets (efts) Some are more advanced than others, already having legs and their gills are beginning to shrink. The others are still very young with only the first sign of their developing legs and larger feathery gills.
I am so pleased that they chose 'my' pond to breed in, it takes me back to my childhood when i used to go pond dipping.

That's fantastic news Venus, I'm happy for you
It's always so fascinating to watch wildlife breed and develop, isn't it ?

And the saga continues... I am so pleased for you, Lady Garden-Goddess.

OOooh pond dipping... I dont think I've ever done that. I grew up in London... No ponds. Hence, what do newts look like?

Hiya jack
Newts look like lizards, but they are amphibians. The baby's are very cute, similar to frog tadpoles, but slimmer and a light brown colour.

Aaah.... interesting

They really are fun to watch. They like to sunbathe of the surface of the pond...nothing like a bit of a tan eh!

I dont tan, I burn *hides from sun* I have pale skin

Its not good for your skin anyway, it prematurely ages it, which is probably why my arms look 10 years older than the rest of me

Hows the artwork going?

*giggle* *snort* I need to learn how to stop doing that when I laugh.... *giggle* Ooooh you should see this room. Ooooh you really should. I cant find anything! Every, and I mean EVERY single surface is coated in bits of drawn on paper. The nurses keep coming in and giving me severe looks *attempts to be cute and meek in order to calm them*

Ooooh dearie me. If I had a publisher, I'd be dead by now. I'm appalling with deadlines. I get bored of projects, then forget about them, then lose them, then find them again and hate what I've done so start again, then ... well you can guess

I bet you do 'cute' and 'meek' very well
I know what you mean by starting things and getting bored half way through, i do that with alot of stuff
Have any of the nurses offered to pose for you?

I wish!

....

nah, they just terrorise me with needles

Thats no good, you need to turn on the charm or even

Do you get to leave there sometimes?

weekend!

He needs SOME time to re-stock on stripey socks and sketch paper.

And pens. I run out my ink-flow pens fast. And pencils. I use mechanical pencils and run them down. And pocky sticks. And other sweets. And my many bottles of water

Jeez, you must be weighed down with stuff when you return

....


I employ a porter monkey

....

Perhaps named "GodBen" ?

No, thats my guideML fiend. My porters name is Dave. Or sometimes his name is ricky. When its Dave, he swears alot and drags his knuckles (he isnt trained properly), When I use ricky the monkey he complains about the state of the place and brings me food. Training monkeys is fun