h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This is a good entry, i don't have any real comments about the content. However i don't think you need quite that many examples of words that could replace "mum", i know you are trying to make a point, but its not a point that is fundamental to the entry and just distracts from it, IMHO. Also, i don't know if you want to mention it, but a lot of people use euphemisms when talking about death, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss" for example, this probably comes under the same catagory as "I'm sorry to hear about your mum's death", but it does sound a but silly really, like "i'm sorry", it doesn't really fit, it makes it sound like you were careless and dropped your mum whilst you were walking in the park, which is just plain stupid, that is clearly not going to ever be the case. Not a major point, and not one that need much of a mention, if any, but i don't like not having anything bad to say about an entry.

Tango

thanks for commenting!

i'm not sure if i totally agree with a couple of your comments, so i'm gonna wait for someone to back you up or disagree.

spook

I'm not sure if i agree with them either, i just thought i might as well mention them and get people thinking.

Tango

well, i am happy with how the entry is, so i'm just gonna leave it as it is unless someone does come along to agree with your comments, or says that they think it is fine how it is. i wrote this entry based on personal experience, so i don't think it's wrong in any way. you mentioned all the names at the beginning before, and i put so many in to make a point, and show that this applies to the death of anyone, and i think it does that quite well.

spok

I understand why you put the names there, and i agree that it makes the point very well, but I don't think that point is really a major one, the responses it what is important in the entry, so having such a long list detracts from what i see as the main point of the entry. Half the list would still make the point well enough, IMO.

Tango

ok, i've cut the list of names down by 1/3 - 1/2. is that better?

ok. Having re-read that bit, i notice you open single quotes before the I'm, but never close them.

Tango

changed, thanks!

also put all the replies and stuff for each section in italics as well.

spook

well, the eidtors are looking for a few short entries, so is anyone interested in this?

spook

Hi Spook,

I've been wracking my brains over this concern with the title. I was wondering if 'Dealing with Other People's Concern Over Your Own Bereavement' might be a bit more concise?

title changed. i'd never have thought of a title like that.

thanks jimster!

spook

Your Guide Entry has just been picked from Peer Review by one of our Scouts, and is now heading off into the Editorial Process, which ends with publication in the Edited Guide. We've therefore moved this Review Conversation out of Peer Review and to the entry itself.

If you'd like to know what happens now, check out the page on 'What Happens after your Entry has been Recommended?' at EditedGuide-Process. We hope this explains everything.

Thanks for contributing to the Edited Guide!

Sorry it's a bit late, computer went pop

SallyM

Hey Spook,

I've been given your great entry to subedit, and the result is at A1004464. If you spot something that needs attention, please drop me a note.

SchrEck Inc.

It all looks great to me!

spook

Fine! Off to the editors with it.