h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

35 years ago today, the people's princess died following a car crash in mainland Europe (she probably wasn't looking through the Rear Window at the time.)

Princess Grace, you were one of a kind.

Still, it made me ask, what is a Princess's job, and how good were Princess Grace and Princess Diana respectively at it? It seems that there are different views of what a princess actually does.

Traditional view: Have 'an Heir and a Spare'
Grace: had two daughters and a son
Diana: had two sons – William and Harry, who shared their names with Sandown's two fire engines.

Disney view: Look pretty and sell merchandise
Grace: vision of timeless classic elegance
Diana: showed the world that you can have a bad hair day all day every day and still be a princess. Despite a one-woman crusade to perpetuate the worst of 80s fashions well into the 1990s, she sold loads of wedding memorabilia and gossip magazines, and is still one of the two front page stories seen on the cover of the Daily Express.

Storybook view: Live Happily Ever After
Grace: Had a stroke while driving and died.
Diana: Had a car crash and died.

Hollywood view:
Grace: Film 'Grace of Monaco' (2014) starred Nicole Kidman. Budget $30 million, box office $26 million. Critics' view: awful.
Diana: Film 'Diana' (2013) starred Naomi Watts. Budget $15 million, box office: $21.5 million. Critics' view: awful.

UN Ambassador view: make a better place
Grace: patron of the arts, advocated breastfeeding and founded World Association of Children's Friends.
Diana: helped destigmatise, AIDS & HIV patients, her patronage and campaigning on behalf of anti-landmine charities led to the international ban on use of landmines, sold off her clothes for cancer charities (but not the ones she was wearing at the time), founded Children with Leaukemia, also heavily involved in leprosy, homelessness and mental health charities.

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Through the power of media, Diana, or rather her image, achieved an iconic status that few have matched before or since (as to others, Marilyn springs to mind, as well as men such as Che Guevara, Elvis and Chairman Mao). Had Diana been Catholic, I'm sure she'd have been canonized by now.

I think you've got the role pretty much tied up there. We see Kate doing all the same things today.

Who needs to be Beatified when you can be uglified by the people of Chesterfield? See:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-derbyshire-41243025
I can only assume it was made by descendants of the architect behind the twisted church tower. They should stick to sofas…

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I don't think it's as bad as all that! Maybe the lip colour should be darker, but from a distance it's passable. This is a well dressing, not a photo. What do people expect?

They expect the second coming of the goddess Diana.

Now it may well seem to you like Diana lived her life like a in the wind, but no-one could light up a room like Grace Kelly:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGASCP2mNaM

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Anyone with wind should avoid or so they say. I wonder if Elton had this mind when he wrote the song?

To avoid confusion, Princess Diana shall hereinafter be referred to as the Party of the First Part whereas Princess Grace shall henceforth be referred to as the Swellegant, Elegant Party.

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