h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Everything going right for you Steven? You have a Dailyness link establish- I hope. You have a haircut and the water filter cleaned and another juicy riddle keeping everyone on their think boxes.

Time without anyone to fill in the gaps is getting very, very dragging.

Though the week itself will eventually melt as does the holiday heat into one neverending timescale known as day and night. No other days, time will stand still.

I hope that you made the right decision on BF audios and cannot wait to hear more about your proposition to BF.

Hello there Richard,

My hair is snipped as short as possible with out causing me damage, my water filter is changed and raring to go, the Dailyness is updated (I could plug the excellent new interview, and the wonderful new TV listings, and also the incredible new mailing list feature which updates readers when new articles are added, but I won't) and the new riddle (well three) is up and waiting to be solved.

And how are you this fine day? Been up to ought?

Regarding BF's, I'm trundling off to Norwich on Tuesday to have a look round Kulture Shock, you know, generally crinkle the wrappers, and handle the CD's, and maybe even buy one (shock, horror, gasp, so we'll have to see what pricks my curiosity).

On the subject of submitting something to Big Finish though, the answer is a negative (um, in English that means I haven't submitted anything). I had quite a few ideas buzzing through my head, and I felt some of them probably had something in them, but I'd never got down to write them, and I didn't feel like writing one, and I didn't want to rush writing something... I don't know why really, but I didn't feel in the mood for doing one, and I let the time slip by. I suppose Time Gentleman has all been sent off now, and is lying on the doormat of Big Finish towers. You haven't heard anything yet, I presume?

Been up to ought? I don't think I've been there, is it on the coast?

I'm well, doing nothing- that sort of thing. Trying to clear writer's block from my mind in order to write another novella. So you're popping over to Wildenopolis on Tuesday- the greatest shame really because I'm finally going in tomorrow to get Full Fathom Five at last. Such a shame, entering the shop glancing to the left on action figure toys and then wandering up the steps to glance at everything there on the revolving stack.

As for your submission, I get the feeling that one day you will emerge and take your rightful place as the supreme power in the surrealiverse! Time Gentlemen is off whether it's either on the rug or in the bin is another mystery altogether?

You know, apparently, it's harder to publish a short story or novella than it is to publish a full length novel. There's no money in short stories - there's only 8 magazines in Britain that buy them (and one of them is "Dart's World", which requires stories with a "dart's theme").

Oh yes, I know what you mean about Kulture Shock - take a quick look at the plastic rubbish there, wander around the room at the back with the books, go up to the poster room, and then go up the other steps to flick round the revolving stack for a while and poke at the videos

Actually, I bought seven videos the other day - in Amazon's lovely sale. I saw they were selling them for £4.99 each so I had to get seven. Actually, I might get some more shortly.

Seven videos at 4.99 each so basically that for five pounds but minus 1p so instead of 35 pounds you spent £34.93 pence.

So what did you get? Hope you decided to get a few double vids in with the lot. As for myself I am an owner of a vast array of videos, the only one I do not have on the Amazon list is The Ark.

As for Kulture Shock today, it was quite vacant of new stock* not even Jubilee was on the stack so everything pre-this year you can get, no sign of Flip-Flop

I'm trying not to let you get your hopes up. Still the Ottakars still have a few BF audios, the only other place to sell them minus Dark Flame and Pirates but they do have Lazarus and Creatures of Beauty and Auld Mortality.

Anyhow thanks for the info on Dart's World- I might have to adapt the story to have Doctor Who & The Dart's World Invasion of Earth. We join the story to find in the not so near future where a race of evil Darts have entered a glactic Darts competetion and plan to flatten the world into a giant Dartsboard!




*See There's a Dalek in Ottakars.

Evening Richard,

The vids I got from Amazon were: Survival, Dragonfire, Battlefield, The Happiness Patrol, Castrovalva, Inferno... there was another one, but I'll have to go and check what it was I would have got more double packs... but I had the rest, and as much as I like the Green Death, it's probably best only to have it once...

You were right about Kulture Shock... their newest CD was "Bang-bang-a-boom", which is 39, I believe, and since we must be up to about 45 ish by now, that's over six months old. Maybe I'll order some from the website then... they're a penny cheaper there afterall.

I see what you mean about the Dalek in Ottakars I'm not quite sure what it's promoting (except Doctor Who itself, that is) I mean, the Peter Cushing films haven't been released on DVD lately have they (I know they've allready been released twice, but they're not planning to release them again are they?)

I thought at first the sign was joking about talking "if and when it feels like it", but I walked past a few times hopefully, and then, just when I'd given up hope, it spurted out the old favourite "you will be ex-ter-min-nat-ed".

Actually, you know that story Mark Gattis likes coming out with? Where he dressed up as a Dalek, and was chasing some children up and down the bridge, and then one turned to their father and said "Daddy, what are they?"? Well, that very nearly came true today. While I was in Ottakars, two little kids (10 maybe?) came up to it, and one said, "have you see the thing?" and they both pointed at it, and then the second one said, "look, hehehe, it's got a sink plunger," and then they looked at the sign and read: "please do not climb on the... dal-ek" (Sylvester McCoy style pronunciation there). I would say I felt old... but that's a silly thing to say.

Anyway, just then, when I was beginning to feel a bit depressed aboutt he future of Doctor Who, the Dalek came out with it's catch phrase "Stay where you are!" You should have seen those two kids jump. One of them screamed as well. And then they both ran off. Great stuff. I felt like buying a CD then and there, just for that, but since they didn't have Flipperty-flopperty (they did have more than Kulture Shock though) I decided to keep my money in my grubby little protuberence, and come home... maybe I'll order it from the site, or maybe I'll go to Amazon again... only time will tell :p

Hello there Steven, I was about to ask how the trip was?

Oh well- it will just be one of those things with Kulture Shock, sometimes they have it and other times they don't. My biggest annoyance is I bought The Dark Flame and so far it's the worst one this year.

Oh well I can but try later when they both- hopefully get Full Fathom Five and He jests at scars together. Have you tried then- Auld Mortality or even Lazarus? Because really Flip-Flop is a gimmicky thing- it was called Vice Versa until Gary Russell came along.

Still it's good to know that I wasn't hallucinating about the Dalek but hearing about the kids- these must be straight from The Phantom Pestilence generation who thinks that Sci-Fi is all Jar Jar Binks. I'm glad- yes you heard me correctly that the Dalek gave them a fright.

A woman occupying the chair yesterday next to the CD stack merely YAWNED when it spoke and everyone was giving it one or two embarrassed looks while the others ignored it. I actually felt sorry for the thing and wished that it was real, now that would be interesting!

'Grubby little protuberance' I hope I read you right, you have a stubby dirty tube that you keep money in? Is this another side to you that we haven't seen before?

Amazon? Do Amazon sell BF audios? I once saw Real Time advertised on it but for 14 pounds instead of 10 and they said that it would be up to six weeks before they could get a copy while I went in the next day and got one there and then.

So aside from that failure on Kulture Shock's part how was your day?

I was debating whether to go for Lazarus instead of Flip-Flop... I don't know now... I can't stand the confusion in my mind But then, maybe I should go back and try Neverland then... oh dear, now I don't know... I know I've asked you this before, but I'll ask again now, and go by what you say: after Chimes, which is your favourite Big Finish? I don't really feel like trying the "Unbound" ones - I don't doubt they're excellent, but I feel as if I should keep remain loyal to the "official" Doctor Who ones, at least at first.

Maybe this is backward of me, but is Lazarus a "sequel" to Project: Twilight, because I don't have that one, and I'm not sure if I'll need it to understand it...

I was a little afraid that the Dalek would be met like that, but when I was there, the reception to it, was surprisingly good. There were an older couple who were looking at it, and I saw three of four people go and look at the BF's (any of them could have been from the boards... and I wouldn't have known).

I couldn't work out what actually "set the Dalek off" I mean, was it motion sensitive, or did it "go off" at random? Ah well, we'll never know. When someone called it "the robot-thingy" I had to go and correct them that it has a "bio-organic core". They won't be making THAT mistake again in a hurry :p

<<'Grubby little protuberance' I hope I read you right, you have a stubby dirty tube that you keep money in? >>

My hand, Richard, my hand...

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I was thinking more of going for some more vids... I think my collection numbers around 40. Two shelves worth, but I could always go for some more.

I haven't really seen many places that sell the BF's. I know if you join DWAS, you can get £1 off them, but that's not really worth the trouble. It looks like the best way to get them is at £13.99 each... I suppose, eventually they'll start selling off the early ones cheap - the tapes are reduced in Kulture Shock, but only down to £6.99, but that'll be a while.

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Not too baddly, I bought a Tintin posted from Ottakars (they've gone Tintin mad there, if you noticed - apparently, the whole chain is named after a character from the series), but nowt else. I had a moan about Starbucks (as usual) and then I had a drink there :p for an overpriced coffee bar with a ridiculous atmosphere they're surprisingly addictive...