h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

jwf has made a few comments on my Benedict Arnold entries;

Most important is the clarity of the link at the conclusion of the first entry.

>what I saw on the page of Part 1. The link was
too subtle for my sensibilities. The hyperlink was
buried under the name General Arnold and not under
the subheader Benedict Arnold's Story Continues

the existing line reads

"< LINK >General Arnold< /LINK > would soon travel to New York State, where he would earn even more honours and the ultimate disgrace in the years that followed."

may I suggest a change to

"In < LINK > part two < / LINK> General Arnold (will) soon travel to New York State, where he earn even more honours and the ultimate disgrace in the years that (follow).

The change of tense is to reflect that we will read. This is also more consistent with the link in part 2

two other comments are only the change of a singe word or two;

in part 1 A87768418

>Also, since this is an Edited Entry, may I suggest there is
a typo on the word 'statics' in the third paragraph under the
subheader Battle of Valcour Island which I have assumed was
meant to be read as 'statistics'. It is otherwise well written,
well edited and quite readable.

he is correct

and in part 2 A87768409

> It is a possibility is that Arnold looked at his own retarded advancement in rank, the promotion of men he saw as incompetent and the poor judgement of Congress as the doom of the Revolution.

It is possible that "looked at" is an American idiom and the phrase could be replaced by "considered" for better clarity.

Thanks

FS

oops earn = earns

Thanks FS, I've done those now

GB