h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Yar is standing in front of his workbench, wearing a bright red labcoat and safety goggles, as well as a shirt-pin depicting the Hodge Podge of Discordia (A258608). On the bench in front of him, there is a half-completed machine with a sort of exit-slot at one end and a set of dials on the other. With a sonic screwdriver in each hand, Yar is apparently pounding away at the machinery like a drummer on a drum kit. Somehow, this actually seems to be assisting in the construction of whatever the machine is.]

[After a few moments of this, he seems to be drawing the drum session to a close. He moves in for the dramatic final drumroll, when suddenly there's a loud noise. Yar frowns, then pokes something with one of the sonic screwdrivers (it's the original design from the Fourth Doctor era, by the way; the other one is from the 2006 series); there's another Yar examines the machinery closely, then pulls out one of those shiny computer chips from Star Trek: The Next Generation, and puts it into a PADD. He stares at the screen, which has a command-line interface.]

[Yar] ... Well, spoony. I should've known that on this hardware, the neutron flow program would have too many bugs. Oh well, at least now I know Linux *runs* on Isolinear circuitry ...

[He looks around thoughtfully]

[Yar] Aw, what the hell, this looks like as good a time as any. Hey, you guys!

[Cut to a large group of Japanese hard-helmets sitting on the floor nearby. One by one, they shake, and then tilt upward, revealing that they are actually Metools. As he speaks they all start moving, seemingly chaotically but with a built-in purpose.]

[Yar] Time for the big move! We're going to the move ahead of schedule. Anyone not ready now gets stepped on! To reiterate! All stuff will go into my user space, where they will be unpacked in my Journal. Priority will be on computer equipment, not-quite-so-hazardous materials, and --

[Monster Plant] [right behind him] FEED ME SEYMOUR!

[Yar] [jumps and turns] ... Oh, you haven't died of malnourishment yet? Fine. [pulls a lever on a large contraption next to the monster plant, launching a clone of Seymour from Final Fantasy X into its mouth.] And the monster-plant and the Auto Seymour Maker go first.

[He leaves the metools to (somehow) move everything out, and then turns to leave.]