A Conversation for Jackson Hole, Wyoming, USA

Edited Guide Writing Workshop: A9057161 - Jackson Hole, Wyoming, USA

Post 1

U168592

Entry: Jackson Hole, Wyoming, USA - A9057161
Author: MJ - U168592

Another Flea Market Rescue, Original Entry here: A3902069 (with PR thread)

Suggestions etc....you know the drill smiley - winkeye

MJ smiley - ok


A9057161 - Jackson Hole, Wyoming, USA

Post 2

JulesK

Hi MJ,

I always go for the Geog ones!

For a nice change, there are a couple of missing (as opposed to unwanted) apostrophes:

If its summer = If it's summer

If its winter = If it's winter

For me, this Entry seems to split into two parts, the more serious first bit and the touristy, or jargony second bit. I know it's not your structure, by the way and that you'll not be wanting to change things from the original too much.

For example, the 'Up the piste' part is quite short and there may be people out there wondering what

'all the other wonderful stuff that people love and hate about mountain towns in the middle of nowhere'

is. This assumes a common knowledge (I think that's what I mean by 'jargony') that some EG readers may not have. Or maybe it's just me smiley - erm

Anyway - a few thoughts for you smiley - ok

Well done on the rescuing!

Julessmiley - smiley


A9057161 - Jackson Hole, Wyoming, USA

Post 3

U168592

smiley - cheers Jules smiley - smiley

I'll fix up the summer winter bits, what a gaff! smiley - laugh

I think I'll eave the way it is and pop it into PR and see what the consensus there is eh?

smiley - ta again

MJ


A9057161 - Jackson Hole, Wyoming, USA

Post 4

JulesK

smiley - ok


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Edited Guide Writing Workshop: A9057161 - Jackson Hole, Wyoming, USA

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