The h2g2 Post 25.07.22

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Posted: 25th July 2022

The World of Summer

A poster from the US National Park Service warning people, 'Do Not Pet the Fluffy Cows'. The 'fluffy cows' are bison. They weigh about a ton and can reach speeds of 30 miles per hour.

This poster comes to us courtesy of the US National Park Service. The NPS is eager to make clear to visitors that a national park is not a petting zoo. We thought we'd help pass on the message. Bison weigh about a ton and can reach speeds of 30 miles an hour, which they remind us is 'about three times as fast as you can run.' Do not wave at them.

Here at the Post Office, we are wary of black bears, although they are not as bad as bison. Nonetheless, it is advisable not to mess with large predators.

Our contributors this week have been sighting lots of wildlife in the northern hemisphere, though most of the animals are of the bird and butterfly type and not likely to cause local disasters. A possible exception is the emu sighting, but we expect Woolly Mammoth stayed on the other side of the fence.

Emus are really interesting birds, as world social media appear to have discovered this past week. We hope Taylor Blake enjoys her new-found fame. If you hear the new catchphrase, 'Emmanuel, don't do it!' and wonder what it's all about, check out the folks at Knuckle Bump Farm. Our kind of people.

We hope you enjoy the content here while doing your best to keep cool. Advice from your Editor, who is in western Pennsylvania, where it's been in the low 30sC all week: remember, cross-ventilation is your friend, so try your best to generate a breeze. Also: ice, even if you have to buy it. Icebags. Socks in the freezer. Ignore the Germans and drink plenty of liquids. You're not used to this, Europeans: don't move any more than you have to.

And Willem? Keep warm, buddy. Cuddle with that kitty. It's winter down there, and he's sent us another time-travel critter to enjoy.

Have the best week you can, and remember: sooner or later, it's bound to rain. (Can't be soon enough, say the farmers.)

Dmitri Gheorgheni

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Quote of the Week: Why did the chicken cross the road?

It had been crossing so long it could not remember. As it stopped in the middle to look back, a car sped by, spinning it around. Disoriented, the chicken realized it could no longer tell which way it was going. It stands there still.

John McNamee, 'Kafka's Joke Book'
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Water World

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For those who don't get how this works,
Click here in Ripley

Bunny 3, Squirrels 0

Bunny and black squirrel have a showdown over noms.



Thinking About Thinking (Part II)

Robots with hot babes on their minds, courtesy of Project Gutenberg.


Sunset, with Cows
Sunset over a field with cows, by FWR.

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