'Allo there mes amis in Internet-land! Yes, I, ze great Hercules Poirot, 'ave returned to do a spot of ze old movie-reviewing, which can mean only one thing – Kenneth Brannair has coom back to do anuzzer of his adaptations of a book by my old choom Aggie. Zees time it is called A Haunting in Venice. Now, you may well be zinking zat thees movie 'as been out for a leetle while, so why is the review only turning up now? I did ask your regulair correspondent ze very same question and he just said something about 'having to remember how to do the accent', which I could not make ze head or ze tail of; 'e is a very strange chap sometimes.

You may very well recall that it 'as not really been all zat long seence ze last appearance of M. Brannair and 'is moostash, in last year's Carry On Up – pardonnez-moi – Death on the Nile. Eez ze new movie zen ze, 'ow you say, roosh release? Oh, mes amis, we moost bear in mind that ze last film sat on ze shelf for over a year coz of ze pandemic. Even so, ze arrival of ze new film shows un certain confidence in M. Brannair and ze Brannair-Poirot; especially considering zat eet is based (to this we will return) on one of ze Aggie novels no-one 'as 'eard of and does not really 'ave ze all-star cast traditional in zis sort of film. (On the autre hand, nobody in ze cast 'as been accused of cannibalism or is a vaccine-denier accused of sex crimes; you pays ze money and you takes ze choice.)

Ze film get underway in a rathair glum out-of-season Venice in 1947, zus immediately recalling ze spooky mood of Don't Look Now, which is what I zink M. Brannair is going for 'ere. We discovair that ze Brannair-Poirot 'as grown back ze ridiculous moostash since ze end of ze last film and 'as retired to Venice to eat ze pastry and become a recluse. We are not really told why, but it is a verrah important charactair point which sets up the ze moral premise of ze movie. (We are probably intended to assume it is somezink to do wiz ze Second World War.)

'Owevair, ze Brannair-Poirot is dragged (complaining) out of retirement by 'is friend Ariadne Oliver (Tina Fey), an author 'oo wants him to take a look at so-called medium Joyce Reynolds (Michelle Yeoh, 'oo if you ask me is a touch on ze small side for a medium, ho ho). (Oliver turns oop in a few of Aggie's books and is generally accepted to be an example of an author inserting a proxy version of zemself into a narrative.) Reynolds is making ze appearance in a vast and croombling palazzo owned by retaired opera singer Rowena Drake (Kelly Reilly); ze palazzo is supposedly haunted by ze ghosts of ill-used children from years gone by, but Mme. Drake is more concerned by ze recent and somewhat unexplained death of her daughtair.

So, as you might say, all ze usual suspects assemble at ze palazzo as a storm sweeps in off ze lagoon: ze medium, 'er assistant, Mme Drake, her housekeeper, her personal physician and 'is son, ze ded daughtair's ex-fiance, Mme Oliver, and of course ze great Poirot and 'is bodyguard (who, ze film proves, is not always terribly good at 'is job). Is zere a mystery to be solved 'ere, or is it a more philosophical clash between ze profoundly materialistic and atheist Brannair-Poirot, and the spiritual and psychic perspective claimed by Mme Reynolds and ze uzzer people who believe in spooky zings going bump in ze night?

Well, I zink it is not ze spoiler zat while zere is some bumping in the night, zere is also some bumping off, and ze Brannair-Poirot finds 'imself taking on ze case of ze unexplained deaths, all ze while contending wiz ze challenge to his own view of ze world. Will one more broosh wiz death inspire ze Kenny-Hercules to engage wiz life once more?

I don't mind telling you, mes amis, that I 'ad no idea zis film was on ze way until quite recently, and I 'ad to check if it was really an Aggie story or somezink new they had cooked up just for ze screen. Well, you will look in vain for a book called A Haunting in Venice in Aggie's bibliography, but zere is one called Hallowe'en Party which zis is supposedly based on. Zat was ze penultimate book about me which Aggie wrote; it is set in London in ze late 1960s rather zan Venice in 1947, ze characters 'ave been significantly changed and ze plot is completely different, but apart from zis it is an incredibly faithful adaptation. (Mais bien sur we 'ave irony in Belgium.)

Oh dear, it sounds like ze great Poirot is really going to be down on zis movie, n'est-ce pas? Well, 'old ze 'orses, mes amis, for while neither I nor your regulair correspondent are big fans of zis sort of in-name-only literary adaptation, zis is possibly ze best Brannair-Poirot movie yet – ze very unfamiliarity of ze story is a point in its favour, as is ze fact it is not stuffed wiz big-name actors competing to make an impression. It 'as less of that Downtown Abbeh conspicuous-consumption luxury-porn feeling about it which was also a positive. Zere is a subdued and spooky atmosphere from ze start, courtesy of anuzzer solid directorial job from M. Brannair, while 'is performance as a slightly odd version of me is as assured and well-judged as evair. Even ze moostash is barely noticeable zis time.

To be 'onest you always know 'ow zis kind of movie will go – zere will be set-up, zen a murdair, zen I will ask some questions to everyone, someone else will probably be murdaired, zen I will get everyone together and explain 'oodunnit. Zese are the, 'ow you say, conventions of ze genre, and all of zem are 'ere – but I was curious to see 'ow zey would 'andle ze spooky element in conjunction wiz ze materialism of ze Brannair-Poirot: in zis sort of story zere is usually ze rational explanation for everything, but...! A moment of genuine spookiness to thrill ze audience even if it undermines all of ze estimably sensible scepticism ze protagonists 'ave shown. Well, I suppose zere is ze wiggle-room on this front come ze end of ze story, although ze resolution of ze moral premise of ze film doesn't make much sense unless you accept somezink spooky 'as indeed genuinely occurred.

But zis is really fairly small potatoes given 'ow entertaining and well-made zis film is. It really doesn't have very much to do wiz ze authentic Aggie, or indeed ze authentic Poirot, but as pastiches go zis is in the upper reaches of ze pile. Daniel Craig and 'is silly accent 'ave worthy competition as long as M. Brannair and 'is moostash continue to appear in films as good as zis one.

Awix

16.10.23 Front Page

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