Twitter is a wonderful place for learning about the bizarre fringe phenomena that impact Life on Planet Earth. Here is an Earth Edition Special Report on Muzak.

It began thus:

Zayd:
During a late shift, I noticed that the hospital had a grand piano in the lobby. I was bored so I decided to play for a bit.
After a while, a nurse walked up to me. She told me that the hospital was already depressing enough without "some idiot playing Greensleeves downstairs."

Many Twitterers commiserated.

asymmetric jockey
At least it wasn’t that ode so beloved of organisations that put you on hold 'Your call is important here is some muzak.....' then the dread repetitive rendition of Beethoven's Für Elise, played on a xylophone.....

I jumped in to defend my hero.

Dmitri Gheorgheni
There needs to be a law against that!

Someone reported a more positive experience, maybe.

Katey Batchelor
The best on hold music I ever heard was the Can-Can while phoning @BrewDog - it's brilliant!! Real actual music - a pleasure to be on hold.

asymmetric jockey agreed that the 'Can Can' wasn't too bad. Personally, I would have laughed, because I have to picture ballerinas in Hades, but hey…then came this:

Kara Chrome
The worst was a loop of 'See, the conqu'ring hero comes', from 'Judas Maccabeus', apparently played on a 1980s digital watch.

This was getting pretty strange.

Dmitri Gheorgheni
This litany of terrible music gets worse and worse...we need a mixtape to play on Halloween...

So don't tell me Twitter isn't educational.

Dmitri Gheorgheni

22.03.21 Front Page

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