How did our fellow humans celebrate May in 2015?

Everybody's always moaning at me, 'I miss the feel and smell of paper books.' Like I care. Funny, though. Nobody ever tells me they miss the mess of newsprint. Save a tree: getcher news online..

This week, the Post is practically ripped from the headlines. Okay, we compiled these events from the news the week we made up this quiz. At least we were paying attention in the back of the class.

Here are the answers.

1. Druglords in Jalisco, Mexico, celebrated May Day in an unusual way. What did they do to a government helicopter? Shot it down – with a rocket-propelled grenade.
2. What were marchers protesting in Seattle, Washington, USA, on May Day? Capitalism. A riot broke out when police arrested a protestor for rowdy behaviour.
3. How did the Windsor family celebrate 2 May? By having a baby. Of course, Dad can't sign his name very well. We blame substandard schooling. But hey, Charlotte. Hang on to that birth certificate. It proves you weren't born in Hawaii.
4. How did Singapore celebrate World Press Freedom Day on 3 May? By shutting down a political website, of course. They don't like The Real Singapore.
5. What Vietnam-related anniversary was remembered on 4 May? The Kent State shootings. If you don't know about it, read the Guide Entry.
6. Why was NASA tweeting George Lucas quotes on 4 May? Because everybody else was, probably. May the Fourth be with you? (Groan.) Even the Post gets tired of puns like that. It was also an excuse to annoy cats.
7. On 6 May, the US government announced the licensing of some boats from Florida. What is unusual about that? The boats will be ferries – going to Cuba. The Cold War might actually be thawing.
8. What utterly amazing photos were unveiled in Mexico City on 7 May? (Nothing to do with Hitler, promise.) UFO aliens from Roswell. Allegedly. Also allegedly taken in 1947 and found in a closet with some old pictures of Clark Gable (now, he was an alien, look at those ears) and Dwight D Eisenhower. Naysayers are muttering darkly about the Smithsonian and some mummy pics...
9. Why did all the really old folks suddenly want to dance in the streets on 8 May? It was the 70th anniversary of V-E Day. If you'd finally got rid of Hitler, you'd be dancing, too. We recommend some Glen Miller. Even Her Majesty found it memorable.
10. What did the customs officials find in a suitcase in Ceuta (a Spanish possession bordering Morocco) on 8 May? An eight-year-old boy. His dad wanted to take his son from Ivory Coast to Gran Canaria. (And yes, a lot of people try to get in through Ceuta, though not usually in luggage.)

Ha. Bet you didn't know all of those. If you did, brag all over the internet. You're the news junkie champ.

Dmitri Gheorgheni

25.05.15 Front Page

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