The h2g2 Critique: Walt Whitman Refuses to Use the Internet
Created | Updated Aug 3, 2015
The varied carols we hear…but do not believe…
Walt Whitman Refuses to Use the Internet1
needed most, I bring3,
1He preferred writing on leaves of grass. Rather like the ancient Egyptians, we imagine.2Have you taken up your complaint with Mr Carnegie, Mr Whitman? All you need is a library card. Proof of residency in Camden required, and a note from your clergyman.3Dust cleaner?4With any other author but you and William Blake, we would point out pedantically that you don't do your own typesetting. But wait, you do…5Yeah, we get that feeling. Like when you go on about 'athletic Democracy', we get the idea, but wish you had said it differently. The same goes for 'O latent right of insurrection!'6Well, now it is, so there. And you can't do anything about it. Look up 'Public Domain' on Google.7We sort of guessed that, too. The intellect is not what hurts when we read this. The young fellow hosing corn…' How do you hose corn, anyway? Do we want to know?8There are those latencies again. Are they like footnotes? If so, we have untold latencies. No, wait. Ours have numbers, so they're 'told latencies'. You win.9Will the word 'thrill' get through the filther? Yes, it will. Boy, those internet censors are clueless. That was a naughty word back then.
