Yesterday at a meeting of a local Support Group for Abuse survivors, one topic that came up several times was the poor quality of provision for people with mental health problems. In the case of abuse survivors the issues often relate to people in crisis¹. This potentially includes people self-harming, overdosing and people who are a suicide risk. If the mental health provision can't cope with meeting the needs of these most traumatised of people, why on earth should the rest of us expect much support. About five minutes ago I was flicking through twitter when I noticed that one of the carers charities I follow was asking people how they coped with the mental health strains inflicted by the challenges of being a carer. Shall we talk about that today?

At the moment I am relatively fortunate in terms of provision for my mental wellbeing locally. A charity called Care for the Carers has provided me with counselling in the past, although they won't do so at the moment because, reasonably enough they want to spread the focus of their limited resources across all of their members. A local charity called Oakleaf runs a support group for carers looking after people with mental health problems. The downside with them is that they took over when Rethink, a mental health charity, lost the contract for provision of some services in the area a couple of years ago. If Oakleaf in turn lose their contract then the whole business will start all over again, which really isn't giving people the best service. More recently I have been able to connect with a group called Counselling Plus a group of volunteer professional counsellors who aim to provide low cost counselling for people who have the need but only limited funds. None of these services can provide long term counselling and, of course, plenty are not available elsewhere. Certainly there is no guarantee that this sort of support is available where you are.

So what else is there to help? Regardless of the extent to which you are able to access professional support it is always useful to be able to find your own ways to relax and unwind. For my wife and I it is our animals. R has had animals all her life and we have kept them together since before we were married. In that time we have had hamsters, mice, rats, gerbils and, currently, two dwarf hamsters, a rabbit and a hare. That link is to a video of the rabbit and the hare investigating our shopping. They like to do that when we get home because there is usually something in the bags for them. That's not central though, there are two really outstanding qualities of a loved and happy animal that make them, for me, a real antidote to stress and anxiety.

The first is that exist in a world largely untroubled by human concerns. They need varying degrees of stimulation and entertainment, but really all they need is to be healthy, well fed, comfortable, safe and loved. They aren't ever passive-aggressive or sarcastic. They won't be angry and refuse to tell you why. They aren't rude or sullen or selfish and their relatively straightforward and uncomplicated lifestyle and serve as a useful reminder of what really matters and whether or not you have your priorities right.

The second radiant quality our animals have always possessed is an unashamedly demonstrative temperament. Unlike many human beings they don't feel the need to disguise or diminish how they feel and so they simply express is. A few years ago when we had a baby rat, I would be sitting on the bed at the end of the day taking my shoes off, when she would come bounding up the corridor, leap at my face and start grooming my bottom lip. These days our hare will often emerge, even when I get home late, making excited little grunting noises and wanting to lick my face or sit with me for a few minutes. It seems to help them both settle at the end of the day if I read them a bedtime story. Their affection is often simply demonstrated, but it is unaffected and genuine, and if you have earned it from them then it surely means you can't be a completely hopeless person and that your life is not without something to be pleased about.

benjaminpmoore

07.07.14 Front Page

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