Sandwich fillings
Created | Updated Nov 7, 2002
Sandwiches.
They look harmless on the outside, but inside they can be more than "mostly" harmless...
I have, in the past year or so, experimented hugely with the fillings of sandwiches. These are the results of my research:
---------------------------WARNING! WARNING!-----------------------
The following information may put you off sandwiches for LIFE
(the Universe and Everything...)SANDWICH FILLINGS are mostly harmless. The average cheese sandwich is very unlikely to kill, with a few exceptions:
1. It has been purchased from a sandwich shop;
2. It has been on the floor;
3. Your cat/younger sibling has chewed on it.
The first of these reasons is very simple - sandwich shop-bought sanwiches are very EVIL: the cheese tastes of leather and the bread is usually soggy; butter is often no where to be seen. However, it is when cheese is combined with at least five other fillings that sandwiches REALLY become vicious.
As I mentioned in the introduction to my personal space, cheese, ham, peanut butter, BBQ sauce, pickle and eggs will not only taste rather nasty - spoiling the overall effect of the sandwich - but will make you question whatever posessed you to make the sandwich in the first place. For this reason, this sort of sandwich is a waste of valuable sandwich-making resources, and should only be attempted by those [of us] with the strongest of stomachs and the strangest of minds
