Fine literature, much like fine cuisine
Created | Updated Apr 1, 2002
Everyone's got a novel inside somewhere. I'd say that's true, I've certainly got one inside me, Middlemarch by George Eliot, although I don't think it would still pass as a novel, just a smudged, chewed up wreck of a book, with nothing more than a spine to its name and maybe a name to its spine. I expect it's remains will be coming soon, then I can inspect and see if I can make any words out, I doubt it. Did you know George Eliot was actually a woman? It takes allsorts doesn't it, I didn't realise they were up to that sort of tomfoolery in the nineteenth century, remarkable. Charles Dickens was probably a woman too, you never know, rumour has it Shakespeare was a transvestite and Marlowe was gay (Rupert Everett incidentally, who played Marlowe in 'Shakespeare in Love' is always fending off rumours that he's gay, if he's not then he's the gayest straight man I've ever seen...not that I see a lot of gay men you understand). Every now and again, to get back to my original point, why don't you try eating books and reading food, there's plenty of roughage in your average book (especially a Geoffrey Archer novel) and you'll never get confused reading a piece of spam now will you. I hope this entry has helped you in some way and that it's acceptable for the guide, if not...eat my shorts (short stories that is).
