h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Here you see a large selection of space rocks. Browse through our models. If you see one you like, take it for a spin!

U37566, Proprietor

Weighing in at 10,000 Kg the bargain brick is your basic asteroid. In our patented earth crossing orbit you can count on an impact within the next 2000 years. Buy one today!

The unique sodium metal core makes the Double Zowie something to see. Specially designed to maintain integrity during atmospheric entry, the sodium reacts with large volumes of water producing highly explosive hydrogen gas. Maximum bang for your buck!

Available in limited quantities, we fire generic space rocks at the planet Mars, then collect larger chunks of debris from the collisions. The HHBM can be modified to include microstructures that may or may not be primitive life form fossils. All for no extra charge!

2000 tonnes of flying ice. Not clean ice either. Bits of carbon molecules and other galactic debris embedded in it. Not the sort of thing you want in your drink...or your ocean. So what is it doing flying through space?

Warning: Close encounters with major planets or the sun could rend your Big Berg into dozens of Bitty Bergs. Just ask Jupiter about that sort of thing.

The Big Berg is only available in high-eccentricity mid- to long-period orbits.

The NEO I can punch through the atmosphere and take out a medium size city. No atmosphere? No problem! The NEO I will create notable craters on any lesser moon or planetoid. NEO I - Coming soon to a planet near you!

Capable of producing 18 megatons impact energy, the NEO IV does 'severe environmental damage on a global scale'. Available in stone or iron/stone composite.

The ultimate in astronavigation, we set a standard Big Berg on an orbit that passes close enough to Jupiter (Saturn by request) to split it into multiple fragments. The gravitational effects are calculated down to the 32nd decimal point, so without any extra correction the SOP fragments connect with your specified target within the next 12 target orbits. It is all worked out by a terrible complex PERL script!

In 1967 an office block disappeared from Perth Australia. The local authorities blamed it on an explosion, said someone left the gas on. In fact the whole enchilada is 'sitting' in our warehouse.

For the right price we can deliver the Office Block to the coordinates of your choice, at or around 32 miles per second.

This is a one-time offer. Serious enquiries only!