Barbeque
Created | Updated Apr 2, 2002
A strange ritual of the British summer is that of the Barbeque, or BBQ for short. This ritual begins with the first mildly warm day of summer, when charcoal and fire lighters and a good 10 litres of fire starter fluid must be bought. This is the time of year when every British person knows exactly why garages sell charcoal. After starting the fire, a prerequiste of a good BBQ is the ablity to take eyebrows off when the first match is struck, the men and only the men must stand around and remark how well it is going. The man, only a man and identifiable by the bottle/can/glass of beer in his hand, must cook the meat. The meat is known as meat, never burgers. Only this man is allowed near the meat and he will make it clear that he is cooking, no one else. This man, however, as part of the ritual will lose interest in the meat and wander off, at this point a woman will attempt to resecue the meat so it can be eaten, her attempts will be foiled be the man, who reminds her that he is cooking. The meat is finally offered up to the assembled, where upon they will eat half and leave the rest on a paper plate behind a flower pot. At this point, if not before, it will start raining and everyone must go inside, where they will comment on how well it was going and how lovely the food was.
