What kind of name for a column is 'Keystone Corner'?
As it turns out, it's a rather inaccurate one. But in my case when I'm being inaccurate, I like to be definitively inaccurate so I reckon that'll be alright.
It starts out OK because the 'Keystone' bit is meant to represent the Keystone State which is the nickname for Pennsylvania - the state in which I reside. It's the 'Corner' bit that gets me into dangerous territory. You see, I live in south-central Pennsylvania which is about 200 miles west of the nearest corner of the Keystone State. But like I said, we'll just gloss over that minor detail and drive on into the meat of this column.
This is an introductory column so I suppose introductions are in order...
If you haven't already guessed it by looking at the entry details, my name is Jimi X. My name really is Jim, though the story behind my h2g2 nickname is rather convoluted and if you really want to know about it, I'd suggest reading it here.
We've already discussed where I live in some detail. But for a few more specifics, I should tell you that I live close enough to Three Mile Island that our state government recently gave our family pills to take in case of another 'accident' like that partial meltdown they had in 1979. Actually, aside from the possibility of becoming nuclear slag, I'm pretty happy living where I do.
Another detail slipped out in that last paragraph if you were paying attention. I've got a family. We're your traditional nuclear1 family - a wife and two kids (both daughters). My eldest is seven and the youngest is three. They're really great kids and I'm rather fond of the wife too.
What else to say by way of introductions?
Right. I've got a job2. My primary source of employment is working in a public school district where I work in the communications office writing newsletters and press releases, building the web site and generally having lots of fun playing around with pencils and paper. My other job is just a throwaway at a local bookstore, but it gives me a 40 percent discount on all my purchases so I've not given it up yet.
My lovely wife works in a fancy restaurant as a waitress a few times a week. Actually, her official job title is something fancy and pretentious that I can't ever remember or say properly, but her duties involve bringing delicious, if expensive, food to snotty, if well-heeled, diners. She works nights and I work days so there's always somebody home with our daughters because we decided not to put our kids in daycare.
Is that it?
Nope, I suppose I'd better talk a little about how I came to h2g2 a little over three years ago. It was a pretty standard story really. I was doing a web search for information on Douglas Adams and stumbled across the site.
I read a call for entries about International Driving Etiquette and made a short contribution on making left turns in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I've written a few more Guide entries since then, and I guess I've really bought into Douglas' vision of building a collaborative guide to Life, the Universe and Everything.
Well, that's about it.
I'm planning for this Keystone Corner thing to run weekly in The Post. I'm aiming for roughly 600 words each week which ought to be just enough that you don't get too bored and I don't have to work too hard.
See you next week!