h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Did you just go to see this film to have something to review?
Cos it was obviously going to be rubbish. Although my 15-yr-old brother wants to see it, that's probably just the miniskirt and boots talking.

Um, well, let's just say that finding new material for the column is sometimes a factor in deciding whether or not I go to see a movie or not.

And while this film did turn out to be a bit of a stinker, Jedi Jade rather liked it. The alternative would have been a 'golden oldie' review of Lethal Weapon 4, The Omega Man or Countess Dracula, and they never get the same feedback as new stuff.

There are no bad movies, only boring ones... and now I'll know to catch Girlfight if I get the chance.

There are so bad films, the ones where you say 'why did i spend money/time watching this?'

Well, I was speaking as someone who writes about films as a hobby. I find I can always spend the time trying to figure out what kind of film the director was trying to make and what made the film turn out so badly. Plus there are always cheap gags to be made at the expense of really bad films!

Ah, yes, cheap gags. Always useful, those.
But you actually spent money to go see this film?


Some people are .
You're just encouraging them to make more sucky films, if they think people will go to see them...

Are you calling me ?
(Fair point, just a bit forthright, that's all...)

Well, I'd love to be able to get in for films free but unfortunately the Post isn't a proper newspaper and as such doesn't get review invites.

Plus, I *didn't know* it was going to be a bad film, sometimes I see a slated film and love it, or I'm really unimpressed by one everyone else has raved about. (JJ really liked Resident Evil, as I just said.)
There's not much point in trying to be a critic (even a pretend one) if you're going to take everyone else's word for whether a film's any good or not.

And the Resident Evil sequel was already greenlit when I went to see it. Not to mention that going to the pictures makes up about 41.5% of my social life, you wouldn't begrudge me that would you?

Can you make your social life include good films though? If you go with anyone to see a sucky film they're not gonna be liking you any more for it. (going on your own is a bit dodgy when it's about girls with not enough clothes on)
Films from games...
Girls kicking people while wearing minidresses...
Did you not see the signs?

Oh, and where did the statistics come from?

I hope my social life will include nothing but good movies, but as Sturgeon's Law says, 90% of everything is rubbish!

On those occasions when I go to the pictures in company, it's either a film we've agreed to go and see out of a shared belief in its potential merit, or I'm with family who are obliged to like me no matter how terrible the film is (plus I'm usually buying the tickets, which only makes it a waste of time - three hours in te case of Pearl Harbor, but still...)

I take your point about the solo moviegoing thing but it's something I've had to learn to do over the years (I found out the hard way that 'hey guys! there's a black and white subtitled Japanese samurai Noh theatre version of Macbeth on at the library cinema! Let's get popcorn!' never got much of a response). I also take your point about the 'films from games' thing but as far as girls in minidresses kickboxing go, well, I may not aspire to the lofty heights of Oxbridge University, but that to me has every promise of a cracking night (or afternoon) at the cinema.

Statistics: hmm, I've got the maths wrong as usually. I go to the pictures 2 weeks out of 3 normally, and also every week I trundle along to, well, ahem, never mind about that. So over an average three week period (what a pitiable I am, actually doing the sums) I normally get out of the house 5 times, 2 of which will be to the pictures. So it should be 40%. Bother...

Girls in minidresses can do as much tae-kwon-doe or whatever as they like as long as they have sarcastic remarks and at least a pretence of a plot (oh, and cute vampire guys are a bonus, don't think that I can't enjoy tacky stuff just cos of the cambridge thing).

The best thing about seeing a film is getting to talk about it after (or during) so I really have to take at least one like-minded friend, fortunately there's almost always someone who agrees with my taste, or is open to be bribed with haagen-daz icecream. And 3 hr films are good, I don't feel like I'm getting my money's worth if it's only 90 minutes.

I think we've battled each other to something approaching agreement on the miniskirt issue (and it's not often I've been able to say that to a young lady of the female persuasion).

Not being well provided with friends, like-minded or otherwise, if I wanted to have a discussion about a film i'd have to write a review of it on the internet or something - waita minute!!!

Film length doesn't really bother me. You can have a perfectly-formed 90-minute miniature like Godzilla vs Mothra or The Spy Who Shagged Me or a breathtaking colossus like Seven Samurai or Magnolia. Though I agree you may have a point with the value for money thing (oddly enough film studios prefer shorter movies which is probably why Lord of the Rings had half an hour cut from the theatre print).

How Dare They!?! Give me more! I demand a refund, and to be furnished with a video of the full thing immediately. Oh, and free entry to all new films for a year! (I expect I'll find someone who wants to see them if I don't)

They like short films because they can screen more in a day and get more money.

Going to see Goldmember on sunday. If they added more of the Evil family (especially Scott) they could make it longer without losing the funniness.

I may have libelled the LOTR producers, BTW, all I know is that the special edition DVD out in the Autumn has about thirty minutes extra footage on it (most notably a big battle between the elves and the goblins about two-thirds of the way through).

Am tempted to comment on Goldmember but - who'd've thunk it? - there's a much lengthier dissertation on the movie in tomorrow's Post, and I'd hate to spoil it...

I know. I need that 30 mins. I can sit still for 3 1/2 hrs if I feel like it, honest! (especially wondering how they're gonna get by without the gifts from galadriel, which do come in useful later) If you haven't read the books that won't make much sense, but when did I last make sense?