h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: The 1981 Professional Air Traffic Controllers strike - Death of a Union - A76659619
Author: Not Banned Yet - U180337

"the most significant event in accelerating the decline of organized labor in the United States in the late 20th century"

Hi NBY, there are some issues here I think need re-looking at. The title is awfully long yet not descriptive enough in the sense that a reader isn't aware this is a US based event until reading about a third of the article. The lengthy title causes issues when viewed in other formats such as mobile PDA's etc. I'd suggest something like:-

The 1981 US Air Traffic Controllers Strike

I'd re-title the sub section 'Consequences' and use your phrase 'Death of a Union' as the sub-header.

You have a sub-heading called 'Afterword'. Is this meant to indicate events after the strike?, which, if so, should be 'Afterwards'. As that doesn't read well as a sub-header either I'd use 'After the Strike' as a sub-header.

A minor typo here...
"A mere ten percent, about 1,300, of the striking workers returned to work with the allotted two days".


**A mere ten percent, about 1,300, of the striking workers returned to work within the allotted two days**.

BMT Scout

All suggested changes have been made. I'm especially grateful for your suggestion regarding the title. I knew that it was too long, but couldn't come up with something better.

NBY

I had never heard of this before. I really enjoyed reading it.

I didn't find any places where I found your meaning unclear or spelling errors (although I don't fine comb for those on a first read through).

The only bit that I would change is your order of your two ironies at the end; I would talk about getting the President elected before discussing something that he did whilst President. It's a only a tiny little thing though.

Thank you.

I actually like having the ironies at the end. It's kind of my own version of a surprise ending/ If others also feel that placing PATCO's endorsement of Ronald Reagan at the beginning, I'd be open to that modification.

NBY

<>

Got it.

Thanks.

Hi all. This is shaping up to be another great Entry. Any further comments/corrections before we whisk this one away for inclusion?

Unless someone else has something to suggest, I think it's good to go.

Agreed

h5ringer
Scout

Your Guide Entry has just been picked from Peer Review by one of our Scouts, and is now heading off into the Editorial Process, which ends with publication in the Edited Guide. We've therefore moved this Review Conversation out of Peer Review and to the entry itself.

If you'd like to know what happens now, check out the page on 'What Happens after your Entry has been Recommended?' at EditedGuide-Process. We hope this explains everything.

Thanks for contributing to the Edited Guide!

Congrats NBY

Well done

well done.


BMT Scout

Well done, NBY!!

lil xx