Spoiler Warning

This article discusses plot points and surprises from Star Wars Episode II - Attack of the Clones. Please don't read any further if you haven't seen the film.

Executive Summary

This was, with no word of hyperbole, the greatest time I've had in a cinema for many, many years. It was a total joy from beginning to end, and very possibly the best of the series so far (although I'd have to let some time and more viewings pass before it can eclipse The Empire Strikes Back).

So What's So Great?

Where do I start? At the beginning? After the obligatory crawl, Lucas subtly signals something new in an incredibly simple way - the camera pans upwards to Coruscant, as Amidala's ship comes into view. Those of us who know the films inside out know that it's supposed to pan down. In this tiny way, Lucas is signalling that we should expect the unexpected.

The opening, where Obi-Wan and Anakin pursue an assassin through the flyways of Coruscant has interesting echoes - Blade Runner and The Fifth Element in turns. It's a side of Coruscant we haven't seen - closer to ground level, neon, busy, convincing. This chase is fast, and at times nailbiting. As good as anything in any previous film - Speeders on Endor, for example. Culminating in Jango Fett's first appearance.

"Is this a Kissing Film?"

Let's cut to the thing that probably worried most Star Wars fan - romance. It's an integral part of the story, and I felt it was handled well. Not quite up to the Han and Leia level, but then, these are very young people, and teen romance always strikes me as a little unreal. However, both were engaging, and I think pulled it off fine.

Clones?

The sequences on Kamino, where the massive Clone Army was being prepared for an unsuspecting Republic, were interesting. Was it, I wonder, deliberate that the Kaminos were modeled after the 'grey' aliens that seem to be blamed for every 'alien abduction'? Or that the decorative motif they chose for their interiors looked remarkably like crop circles? I'd like to think so. Obi-Wan's fight with Jango Fett was another superb set-piece - I just love Jedi Knights doing their stuff - and Obi-Wan is formidable even without the lightsaber. Even little Boba Fett was good.

Tattoine

Anakin's return to Tattoine was inevitable. We get to meet the young Owen Lars and Beru, and finally discover their relationship to Anakin (and therefore Luke). Deftly handled, and perfectly fits the existing timeline (something many fans thought would be fudged). Briefly, the movie becomes John Ford's The Searchers as Anakin takes another small step towards the dark side (Revenge of the Jedi indeed).

Geonosa

And so to the climax of the film. And even more references. Gladiator is almost Lucas saying 'You thought that was good? How about this?'. He puts his heroes in an impossible position, and you expect them to be rescued immediately, but no - they fight back (much like Maximus in Ridley Scott's film) to similar effect. Except this time, beating the nasties isn't enough. Enter the Jedi. Sam Jackson's entrance in this scene was superb - and you think he'll bargain for their lives, but Lucas surprises again - he's not alone. Lightsabers light up all throughout the arena, and suddenly we're into all-out war.

The battle that immediately follows is, once again, superb. But the Jedi are outnumbered. All seems lost again. Until Yoda rides to the rescue on troop carrier. And the scale of the battle ramps up to eleven.

Things you've waited your whole life to see but hadn't realised until you see them

Dooku (Christopher Lee, immaculate as ever) evades capture, but is confronted by Obi-Wan and Anakin. And he beats them both.

Enter Yoda.

The atmosphere in the cinema audience is palpable now. Dooku and Yoda do duelling force powers, hurling bits of machinery and masonry around with wanton abandon. This is what Yoda's good at, we know. We all remember the X-Wing in Empire. And the two are evenly matched. Until Dooku draws his lightsaber. And the moment we've all known is coming (because this spoiler was well known long ago). Yoda throws aside his cloak, and there it is. His lightsaber.

I think I must be an irredeemable Star Wars fanatic, because (and I'm only slightly ashamed to admit this) I was literally crying with joy at this point. Only a few, manly tears, to be sure, but they were there. I was in Star Wars heaven. Somewhere I thought I'd never be again after The Phantom Menace. The duel between Dooku and Yoda was something I'd waited my whole life to see without realising it. And I think it's because I knew that Yoda could never convincingly wield a lightsaber (or even walk, for that matter). It would just never work. Yoda was a teacher, not a fighter. And, somehow, Lucas pulled it off.

So, you liked it then?

Completely. OK, so Lucas dialogue isn't Tarantino, but, frankly, it doesn't matter. Lucas himself admits that his films are almost better as silent movies. And Attack of the Clones succeeds completely as the spectacle it aims to be. For me, the story flowed well. There were none of the dead patches that The Phantom Menace had. The foreshadowing of events we know are coming was fun, and there were enough surprises to keep me guessing a little.

Here are some of the things that took me by surprise:

• I'd heard about Anakin losing his arm, so when he got caught in the machinery on Geonosa, I assumed that this was where he lost it, but he managed to escape.
• Yoda riding to the rescue - with the clone army. I don't know why this surprised me, but since we all know that these are the immediate forerunners of the Empire's stormtroopers, I had immediately equated them with evil.
• 
  C-3PO's comic relief in the final battle. Somehow, this actually worked, where Jar Jar in The Phantom Menace just annoyed.
  
• 
  It's funny. No, really. I laughed out loud so many times during this movie, and always at the jokes, not at anything unintentionally funny.
  
• Jar Jar - he's in the movie just enough, and actually has some plot function. It almost makes up for his previous performance. Almost.

Special Effects?

Outstanding, as ever. Even the disappointing Phantom Menace was visually sumptuous. Attack of the Clones is even better. And this time, it's totally digital. I saw the film at the Odeon, Leicester Square, where it was presented digitally. And this was the first movie ever shot entirely on 24-frame high definition digital video. When I first heard that Lucas intended to do this, I worried. When you look at the numbers, the picture apparently only has a vertical resolution of something like 800 pixels. This sounds like nothing (the laptop I'm typing this on has 1200 pixels vertically, for example) but I looked carefully, and saw nothing but a perfect picture. The colour was rich, and the contrast was excellent. Anakin's duel with Dooku, which takes place partly in the dark, looked fantastic - almost surreal.

The character animation was typically excellent. A particular standout was Yoda. Until now, he's been a puppet, yet we've all believed in hiom. This time he's totally real, and a surprisingly fine actor. There's one shot in particular where he's thinking about something. His face moves very subtly, not at all in the exaggerated way we're used to with CGI characters, and you're convinced that there is a breathing being, deep in thought.

The climactic battle scene was incredible. Full of detail and texture, and totally thrilling. It completely eclipses anything we've seen before.

So What Now?

That's what worries me. This film worked so well, and sets up everything for the next one, that I fear Episode III can only be a disappointment. After all, there's no happy ending. The Jedi will be wiped out, Anakin turns, Amidala dies (I presume). I can't see Lucas pulling an up ending out of that. Not that we should expect him to - he's stuck to his original plan so far, why should he change now. But however this turns out, Attack of the Clones delivers everything I wanted from a Star Wars movie. I couldn't have enjoyed it more, and my only regret is that next time I watch it, I won't be seeing it for the first time.