h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hello again.
As a Knight Paladin of Evad, and a member of the Evadian Dragon Knight order, I am entitled by law to the following:
1) Quarters with at least one room, with enough space for a bed, a desk, a wardrobe, an armour stand and a weapons rack.
2) An additional room (or more if needed) for the knight's Retinue, should one be gifted to him.^
3) Rapid access to stables.^^
4) On no account should the Knight's room be near to, or contain within it, a place dedicated to the serving of alcohol.^^^

I think point 1 will be sufficient, though I would not object to an office to work from, as well as my room. If you deed the decor, I can give you the info.

^ = I would like to point out that, by Evadian Lore, Women cannot technically be knights. However, in true Evadian fashion, this rules have been bent as far as humanely possible, and there have been several 'men' with rather interestingly developed chest muscles...
^^ = As my good friend and fellow Evadian Paladin, John Dragonheart would say; "If I want a horse, I'll bloody well steal one!"
He always does like getting his own way...
^^^ = That's an /Evadian/ Lore!? The Dragon Knights have obviously lost their rulebook...

i do hope you're not going to make an issue about female knights

Yes, I seem to remember something about "AHHHRGG! MY SPINE! ARRRGAH AHAHA! OWWWW!" coming from this area the last time that argument came up. He had to be carted away in a full body cast.

Well, I'm not certain I can do all that.
1) & 2), no one has any more rooms for private use yet, so I probably shouldn't start...
3) We still can't find the Stables (subjected to the same space-time influxes that cause the Observatory to wander through our castle)
4) The pub's going in just upstairs.

I'll work on scrounging up a Stables, if I can figure out what to do with it. Sorry .

However, we might consider putting in an Executive suit for all the Knights... interesting...

a pub!

and stables

i love this castle

and yes, i /am/ lurking around in here for no apparant reason

just propping up someone's beanbag, by the way who's is it? or did i bring it in? ah well i'm sure it'll sort ifself out in the end

Point against women? I though the '^' covered that bit...
And anyway, the idea of sharing a bedroom with a bunch of scantily clad, heavily armed men is not very appealing...

Hmm? Well, i'm working on an office area for all who hold positions. It's going in where the Chamber of Procrastination was. You'd want a office, yes?

Well I've been made a Paladin, and I'm Master of the Men's Barracks, so I thought it would be apropriate for me to have one.

Ok! Just tell me what you want it to look like, and I'll get on it.

Here goes:

MY ROOM: A bed; a small desk; a wardrobe; a fireplace; a sword and shield holder above the fireplace; a window, preferably in front of (or is that behind ) the desk; a winerack, containing a variety of Evadian, Imperail and a few Azuman wines.

MY OFFICE: A desk, mahogany; Another Fireplace (It gets awful cold at night without central heating...); Another sword holder, containing an Evadian Longsword, above the fireplace; an important looking cabinet (preferably mahogany) for storing paperwork; a Falcon-4 750lb-draw Crossbow in holster near desk (in case of any, ahem, 'unchivelrous' activity).

Got all that?

"And anyway, the idea of sharing a bedroom with a bunch of scantily clad, heavily armed men is not very appealing..."

i'm not sure if i'd agree

I'll start. Do you want your room to be behind your office.

*eye twitches*

Please.

Is your eye okay?

yeah, yeah, I'm ok.

Maybe I can help; I have some skill in field medecine...

Wha?

Your explanation didn't sound convincing...