h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Jeez mate take a breath! I shall hold this in the evidence locker for future torment!

Did the electricity need a passport?

Ps Lucillle always makes me think of Hoovers......no I shall resist!

I have to ask...why does 'Lucille' make you think of Hoovers? I'm suspecting a cool story...

Electricity didn't need a passport, but you couldn't follow its path without getting into the Rhodope Mountains...which were inaccessible without a special permit. There were military doings up there, I suppose to replace the more picturesque bandits of previous centuries.

We had regular brownouts in the summer. So one evening, the kids told me there was a power outage planned. While my back was turned and I was writing on the board, they turned off the lights. I lit a and kept teaching. Then my boss, the mad Albanian, opened the door, and light came flooding in from the hallway...little beggars laughed their heads off...

Mad Albanians? Bandits? Mountainous military skullduggery? Oh what a rich tapestry you both have wove, woven, weaved? You get the picture!

Oh, yeah, some of our students came from up there - they belonged to an unusual ethnic group of Bulgarian Muslims with curly blond hair, who spoke a unique dialect, called the Pomax people, and no, I am not making this up...the kids would drop by our place to play with kittens and tell us amazing tales from the mountains, like how to safely mine gold by offering the mountain spirits a chicken sacrifice...

But they weren't any more exotic than the guys I was singing in choir with today - only I won't tell about them, because somebody might read this.

I'm still waiting to hear about the Hoovers...but you could write it up for a future issue.

Nothing as exotic as KFC sacrifices in the mountains mate, just how to children 'safely' mine for gold? wow you couldn't make it up!

No just a happy memory on Mother's Day (uk), my mum God bless her, always did the vacuuming with Kenny belting out at vol four! Islands in the stream was another hoovering fave for her, probably where I got my mixed love of country music and heavy metal from?

Now, that's heavy metal country, indeed...I can imagine this. A happy memory, indeed!

The Rhodope mountains are where Philip of Macedon (Alexander the Great's father) got gold from. There are small deposits left if you can find them - and the Pomaki (Pomax) people can.

But the spirits have to be placated. So you sacrifice a chicken in the spot you want to mine. If you hear an unearthly scream - you usually do - the sacrifice has been accepted, and you've got your mining permit.

You also need a chicken to pick a housing site. Go to the place where you want to build the house. Sacrifice chicken. Pour chicken blood into dish. Offer blood to pet dog or cat on the spot. If your pet laps up the blood, the spirits are happy - go ahead and lay the foundation.

I love local folklore.