h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Something ought to be put in about the strange people wandering the streets near the town centre. usually clad in clothes having no purpose than to display their brand name, people like this will loaf around George Square telling people how they're not allowed in Queen St. station any more after they were prosecuted for attempted murder. There are the new dour people made to stand on street corners asking people if they want to know where anything is. maybe Strachclyde council are all Luddites and don't trust touch-screen tourist info things.

Those tourist things would probably be broken into in the attempt to find a few bob.