h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Malmesbury and Telecommunications - A59407671
Author: dsg-minder of the yak and yurt cleaner - U13965605

Not sure if this isn't too narrow for the Edited Guide. I just had to write it.

I don't think there's such a thing as too narrow provided the subject matter can be verified

This looks like a good piece that is sufficiently detailed (not that I know anything about TMC), but it's a little dense. Also, it's not immediately clear where Malmesbury is, or why TMC is particularly noteworthy.

Alex

Alex, good points, will add to the introduction.

"... it's not immediately clear where Malmesbury is..."

Malmesbury is in north Wiltshire, A6672468, about 20 miles NNE of Bath. It's the principal town of the Cotswolds.

A

Thanks BigA, have added a link to your excellent Entry.

Hi dsg. It would be good to know where yourself and others think you are with this Entry, as it is looking close to completion.

First person needs to be avoided in Edited Guide Entries - which you've done admirably - but they also need to be written from a neutral, geographical perspective, if that makes sense.

So 'A company called TMC came here...' should be 'A company called TMC came to the town...'

Also we think it would be good to explain more clearly that TMC stands for Telephone Manufacturing Company (ref: http://www.ekco-radar.co.uk/cowbridgepc.php). So something like:

'The Telephone Manufacturing Company Ltd (TMC) came to the town for a brief period after being bought by Pye of Cambridge...'

It would also be good if you could read through this and take out anything that sounds too subjective - such as 'came to their senses later'.

It's very well written and it's only these factors that are standing in the way of it being a robustly edited Entry. Our only other suggestion is giving it a more descriptive and straight-forward title (borrowed from your intro) like 'A Short History of Telecommunications in Malmesbury'. This would just need the start of the first paragraph to be changed to: 'Malmesbury is an ancient Wiltshire town with...' etc.

We hope all this makes sense - and thanks for all your work on it so far.

Cheers
h2g2Eds

Italics. I have changed the entry to comply with the rules, thanks for the suggestions. I also added a few links.

Many thanks dsg. This is looking in great shape now. If everyone is happy, we'll earmark it for submission into the Guide.

Cheers
h2g2Eds

Actually dsg - could you re-check your links please. A couple don't seem to be working.

Thanks
h2g2Eds

Woops, I left out a few http:// 's. All now.

Your Guide Entry has just been picked from Peer Review by one of our Scouts, and is now heading off into the Editorial Process, which ends with publication in the Edited Guide. We've therefore moved this Review Conversation out of Peer Review and to the entry itself.

If you'd like to know what happens now, check out the page on 'What Happens after your Entry has been Recommended?' at EditedGuide-Process. We hope this explains everything.

Thanks for contributing to the Edited Guide!

Well done dsg How many entries is this now?

Well done!!

Thanks lanzababy. I think this is number three!

Thanks lil!