h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Grass is for the cows. Clay court players specialise in a very different game of tennis.

The argument rages at.... http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A583157

The main part is very nicely done, but I think you've a problem with balance in the last few paragraphs. The first sections are all general comment on grass v clay, and your examples cover a fair bit of tennis history - all very suitable for the Edited Guide. But suddenly in the paragraphs about Capriati you switch to comment about this year's tournaments which will get dated very quickly, and a focus on one player which seems unfair given the topic.

Seriously, I'd recommend turning the last bit into a separate entry on Capriati, turning the Women's Game header into a sub-header to match the rest, and reworking that one Women's Game paragraph as the end of the entry.

I'm sorry if that sounds like drastic surgery, but I really like the main section!
Azara

Azara, an excellent critique - which I have acted upon

The stuff on Capriatti was more of a politically correct padding-out exercise... I didn't want to short-change the ladies... I will use it as the basis of a separate article

Thanks

Loony

Loony, you should know better how to write a posting to the Peer Review !

I'll save my comments for the new and correctly formatted thread

Bossel, I was in a bit of a hurry to fill Peta's plea - on the volunteer's mailing lists - for an entry about tennis.

It's all better now

Well, that was one suggestion that got quite drastic results! I think the balance of the entry is much better now.
Good luck!
Azara

Ladies and gentlemen, finish your strawberries and leave please. This thread is being abandoned because the heading was posted in the wrong format. I will start a new one.

Loony

Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'Peer Review Sin Bin' to 'Tennis - Grass v Clay'.

Back to Entry - this became Edited Entry A601750 Tennis - Grass vs Clay