Procrastination
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
Oh, It Can Wait...
Procrastination is the art of putting off until tomorrow what could be done today. The ultimate aim of the procrastinator is to put off a task long enough that someone else will take on the job for them. It is most prevalent amongst students and men shopping for Christmas presents1 though it can also be seen in authors who take years to finish writing their latest novel and anyone else who doesn't really like their job.
No It Can't...
The main way of getting around procrastination, and actually getting to the stage of completing a task, is to find another even more distasteful task to complete instead. There is a pecking order to the level of distaste that a certain task will incur and a
corresponding procrastination order. Tasks approaching the top of the list will only be completed under a credible threat of Death or Pain2. Note that
the threat must be a credible one, in other words, one that is likely to be carried out, or the procrastinator will just disbelieve it and will continue to put off completion of the task.
Whilst these threats are equally applicable to tasks further down the list, the completion of those tasks can similarly be encouraged by the simple appointment of a more distasteful job. For example, for the majority of the year a typical teenager's bedroom will be a
complete mess; nothing could be done to encourage the youngster to tidy things away. However, as soon as the prospects of exams and revision appear on the horizon, the place will be spotless.
The Distaste List
Below is an example of one researcher's distaste list. Each individual's list is likely to be slightly different but turns out to be extremely useful in getting them to do something.
- Revision for exams
- Do It Yourself work
- Household Chores
- Coursework
- Cooking Dinner
- Shopping
- Reading a Novel
- Watching Television
- Accessing H2G2
- Going out with friends
Numbers at the top half of the list are most disliked whilst numbers further down are vastly preferred and actually enjoyed. Now, in order to get this researcher to do any of the top five tasks, you must first make sure that they cannot do any of the last five, for example, by grounding them, disconnecting the computer from the internet, refusing to renew the TV liscense, burning all the books and making sure the shops are closed. Then in order to get them to cook the evening meal you should ask them whether they have any coursework. And, before you can say 'procrastination', you have a five course Cordon Bleu meal laid out on the table in front of you.