Advice for Aliens at Grateful Dead Shows
Created | Updated Sep 29, 2009
First of all next to New York City there is no place more easy to infiltrate and enjoy than a Grateful Dead Show. The weirder you look the better for most of the humans here are either drugged out of their minds or had these same minds blasted by acid years ago.(Note: Beings from gaseous Class A-10 planets should not eat these small pieces of paper the humans call acid as they are not hydrochloric in nature.)Step one: get a high quality Tie-Dyed shirt (this can be purchased for a bad poem, a worse song, or a grilled cheese sandwich money is only used for purchasing drugs) then roll it around on the ground (prefferably dirt and doo doo covered ground),next find at least 1 amplone (1 earth gallon) of patchoolie oil and douse the shirt liberally. Galactic citizens from Class N-8 planets will find an ample supply of their native gases. These tall green canisters are often dragged around by clowns and open mouthed hippies. Step two: Throw your shoes away, walk around vigorously upon the same ground that you prepared your tie-dye. Don't stop until you have a uniform blackness over the entire bottom of your feet, if not certain hippies will not talk to you for you may be "a pig". Step three: Wander around aimlessly with your eyes unfocused and your mouth hanging open, if any natives seem shocked at your appearance just say, "yeah, the electric yellow has got me by the brain bannana too". This will indicated to the humans that they may be experiencing a "flashback" and that will account for the tentacles, probiscus, and or the vestigial tail that the visitor may have coming out of his head.
