The uses of fairy wands at gigs.
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
Ever noticed how useful fairy wands can be? Ever if they're not magical, they are still an invaluable accessory.
Anyone who likes alternative music (particularly glam) should be familiar with the status of the fairy wand amongst the Manics/Mansun/King Adora etc crowd. And yet its many uses are mostly overlooked. For example:
1) You can keep it around waist level, pointing out at right angles from your body, to give anyone who tries to crash into you/climb on you/put their arm around you a nasty shock.
2) You can wave it in the air to attract attention.
3) It may be used as a valid substitute for a cigarette lighter during the slow songs.
4) Similarly, it can be punched in the air if, like me, your arms aren't long enough to reach over everyone's heads during the faster numbers.
5) You can bring it up to eye level to see Nicky Wire/Paul Draper/Matt Browne framed in an attractive pink star shape.
6) It provides an ideal starting point of conversation for anyone wanting to chat you up (sample: "Is that a real wand? Better not get on the wrong side of you or you might turn me into a frog.")
7) You can flirt with it, employing it in the same way that a young woman would use a fan 200 years ago.
8)You can comb your hair with it afterwards.
9) You can get people's attention by tapping them on the shoulder with it (useful in any cases where you don't actually want your skin to come into contact with the peson who's attention who are trying to attract).
10) In the event that it is magical, you can in fact turn annoying drunks/crowdsurfers/hecklers into frogs <fairy>.
They are also slim enough to be held between the teeth in the event that you want to use both hands to clap; and are the correct shape for inspiring the old joke "Is that a fairy wand in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?".
All in all a worthwhile fashion accessory, I think you'll agree.
Post-script: I'll admit that they do tend to get in the way of nearby cameras a bit; so that when people see their King Adora photos, instead of having lovely shots of Matt, Martyn, Dan and Robbie, they have lovely shots of Matt, Martyn, Dan and blue sparkly wand with legs. Sorry to all those lovely people :)
Anyone who likes alternative music (particularly glam) should be familiar with the status of the fairy wand amongst the Manics/Mansun/King Adora etc crowd. And yet its many uses are mostly overlooked. For example:
1) You can keep it around waist level, pointing out at right angles from your body, to give anyone who tries to crash into you/climb on you/put their arm around you a nasty shock.
2) You can wave it in the air to attract attention.
3) It may be used as a valid substitute for a cigarette lighter during the slow songs.
4) Similarly, it can be punched in the air if, like me, your arms aren't long enough to reach over everyone's heads during the faster numbers.
5) You can bring it up to eye level to see Nicky Wire/Paul Draper/Matt Browne framed in an attractive pink star shape.
6) It provides an ideal starting point of conversation for anyone wanting to chat you up (sample: "Is that a real wand? Better not get on the wrong side of you or you might turn me into a frog.")
7) You can flirt with it, employing it in the same way that a young woman would use a fan 200 years ago.
8)You can comb your hair with it afterwards.
9) You can get people's attention by tapping them on the shoulder with it (useful in any cases where you don't actually want your skin to come into contact with the peson who's attention who are trying to attract).
10) In the event that it is magical, you can in fact turn annoying drunks/crowdsurfers/hecklers into frogs <fairy>.
They are also slim enough to be held between the teeth in the event that you want to use both hands to clap; and are the correct shape for inspiring the old joke "Is that a fairy wand in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?".
All in all a worthwhile fashion accessory, I think you'll agree.
Post-script: I'll admit that they do tend to get in the way of nearby cameras a bit; so that when people see their King Adora photos, instead of having lovely shots of Matt, Martyn, Dan and Robbie, they have lovely shots of Matt, Martyn, Dan and blue sparkly wand with legs. Sorry to all those lovely people :)
