h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Wow, can I really be the first?

OK, I think if we want to send a message, we have to make up our minds. We can maintain a friendly, safe face, sucking up to the BBC and hoping that the powers that be will have mercy on our souls, or we can throw down the gauntlet, issue a list of demands, and wage a (bloodless) cyber-war that will force people to take notice.

Personally, I think the latter option is the most viable. No BBC executive will listen to what we have to say without a kick in the pants to get them started, and we would be denigrating our Zapatista namesakes by pussy-footing around (moderators please note: this is a reference to catlike stalking, not the female organ...) Just as armed resistance is appropriate to peasant uprisings, we should get some culture-jamming happening around h2g2.

My suggestions are aimed entirely at the disruption of the moderation process, flooding the system, forcing them to wade through page after page of "unsuitable" content.

1. Swear frequently.
You could do it by posting pages consisting of nothing but inappropriate language. These would have to be individually analysed by moderators.
You could do it by 'substituting'. Make everyday words sound rude. Use 'soap' instead of s**t. Use 'fork' instead of f**k. It's not difficult... people get the message.
You could copy the BBC's Red Dwarf, and use the word 'smeg' as an all-purpose expletive. That way, if it's censored their hypocracy will be evident.
You could drop swear-words randomly tits into sentences. The moderators c**t may not pick them up...

2. Foreign languages do not offend - so use them!
If you know another language, use it for your guide entries.
Translate all your current entries into, say French (because the Brits seem to hate the French more than anyone).

3. Self-censor.
This takes the idea of boycott to a new level, but we could create our own 'deleted entry' message, explaining that we are saving the moderators time by removing entries ourselves. This way, the effect would be greater, because we could give the Zaphodista cause a plug and drop in some links, too.

4. Suck up in a rule-breaking way.
Why not use the House Rules against them? Write a series of entries praising the BBC, corporate takeovers, censorship (I mean moderation) and the removal of cultural icons like the Don't Panic! button.
But be naughty!
Use language that "might offend" - The moderation process is f**king
cool! I love the s**t BBC has done to h2g2!
Do it in a foreign language... with a message in English at the top
explaining the purpose of the entry.

5. Strike back with our own disclaimers!
If you see anything on this page that breaks the Zaphodista Manifesto, please click here. For any other comments, please abuse the powers that be. h2g2 contains content that is generated by vistors to the site, and the content of this page may contain anti-BBC, anti-moderation views. If the page is removed in the future, blame the BBC. If swear words are ****ed out, blame the BBC. If h2g2 becomes a dull, lifeless, sanitised community, blame the BBC. No responsibility for any moderation will be accepted by the Zaphodista Army of Cybernautic Liberation.

(OK, so that's kind of s**t. But a good comedian might be able to make it smart, sophisticated, funny, and most of all, cutting)

Keep up the good work guys, I'm off to link some Zaphodista pages from my user space.

Some great suggestions, Almighty (do your friends call you "Al"?). But for now, I'm trying to steer the group into pussy-footing action, and holding off major guerrilla warfare for later.

There's a slim chance that the BBC people who really make decisions for h2g2 just bought the site and forgot about it for awhile, and that they're unaware of what percentage of active h2g2 researchers are deeply disturbed by the restrictions they've imposed, or the percentage of h2g2 researchers who are willing to take action (like boycotts or whatever).

So just in case those decision-makers need a wake up call, we're working on a petition. This is a tidy, responsible way to send a clear message, give them some numbers to work with in case they haven't noticed that 20-30% of names on the list of "who's online" usually have ZAPHODISTA in their nickname, no matter what time of day or night you check.

If the petition has no effect, if we do not hear an explicit reply from the BBC or their representatives, then their silence is a reply in itself. We will know that our next step has to be powerful if we are going to get any response at all.

Anyhow, I really like your suggestions for #3,4 & 5. But I don't think #1 or 2 will help the cause, and might result in getting zaphodistas kicked out. If the editors think a person is dumping swear words or foreign lang onto pages specifically for the purpose of giving the mod*rat*rs extra work, they will give that person a warning and later kick them out. I doubt anyone has been banned for that reason yet, but it's feasible.

For all it's worth, I doubt the petition will have much impact, if any. So we'll be down to the heavy artillery and guerrilla tactics before too long.

Read my entry, http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A539534 , it's about the relationship between the Zaphodistas and the wider anti-globalisation movement. As I see it, anyway.

Cheers,
Rob.

Keep fighting the good fight!