h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My family has always, from time immemorial, made a huge deal out of Christmas. And as the family has gotten bigger, it has become a bigger deal. When I was a kid, every year we went to gramdma's house on Christmas Eve. Everyone brought a dish, so there was tons of food involved. The adults tended to gather in one room to drink and gossip, while us kids usually found someplace to be out from underfoot and be ourselves. Mind you, grandma and grandpa managed to produce six children, all of whom were married and had children of their own. Eighteen or so children could find all sorts of interesting things to do, and you were almost guaranteed to have a few who were within a year of your own age.

After dinner came the torture. All the children had to perform in some capacity. Mostly, we chose to sing. One of my brothers and I have great voices, but I can't really say too much about the others. The parents all made horrible faces behind their hands while the "entertainment" was taking place, but made sure to be positive in their response and applause. Once the torture was over, gift exchange began in earnest. The gifts given on Christmas Eve were opened immediately. With all those children to buy for, it would be too much for all the adults to give to ALL the kids, so it wasn't done that way. Conveniently, it is a Catholic family, and baptisms were kept in the family, so that everyone had a godmother and/or godfather who could bestow a special gift. The night was never closed until Grandma got all us kids together for a photo, and we could never behave for them, and Grandma was still very much a student of photography, so all of the pictures are just awful. There were a few that came out rather nice, though... Grandma managed to shock us into angelic smiles when she instructed us from behind the camera to, "Say 's**t!'"

A generation later, the celebration has been forced to evolve. Not only have my cousins begun to marry and breed, but my biological grandfather has passed on, and my grandmother remarried to a man who brings family of his own to the gatherings. They cannot be held at someone's house, so we rent a hall. And since we're renting a hall anyway, we have them cater the thing. The torture has evolved, since all of my generation considers themselves too old and dignified to participate, and the new children are largely too young to manage. So now we hire karaoke, and everyone, young and old, embarasses themselves at their leisure. Still, considering that it usually the only time all year we see each other, we manage to have a good time, catching up on the overwhelming amount of family gossip that can exist in such a large family.

Sorry to disappoint everyone, but I rather enjoy my family Christmas celebrations, and I look forward to them as the highlight of each holiday season. Even when I was a kid, Christmas morning always seemed so anti-climactic, despite the fact that that was when I got all the best loot.

That sounds an impressively sized Christmas gathering! I guess it's big enough that people who don't get on aren't forced together.

Mine is organised pretty much as the opposite of yours; our family is so small that we keep in regular contact and when we get together for Christmas we're not seeing anyone who we haven't seen for more than a couple of months. So there's no particular reason to bicker at Christmas