h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I find that, although men are viewed as more experienced and that they know what they are doing, most of the time they don't. Women are better at knowing what they want and going out and getting it. Men, on the other hand, are extremely fearful of rejection and not "preforming" well. While some women are self-conscious, they can still get sex from their friends.

Hi Sarah! Wonderful to read your message!

You are right at that. I'll put it in soon! And to make matters worse, men can't deliver it.

"While some women are self-conscious, they can still get sex from their friends." Could you please explain that to me as I have no experience with that?

Are you an english speaking canadian?

Yes, I am an English speaking Canadian, although I have OAC (highschool) French as well.
What I mean by women being able to get sex from their friends is that a lot of women I know have "played" their male friends into thinking they like them and then using them for sex. Another way to get sex from your friends is to have them set you up with someone; indirectly, this is getting sex from (probably better worded as "through") your friends

That's quite interesting. So it's not always the male who piss off after having sex. Couldn't they have the same thing without playing games? I would think so, but maybe they would need to stand to their wishes. I have big problems with that kind of cheating, and I think everybody involved is loosing.

Good feelings,
Wonko

Playing people isn't necessarily cheating; I'm not sure what you mean.

"Piss off"? Are you British? I don't know what you mean by "It's not always the men who piss off..." Please explain. If you don't play the games then you're not using the person; if you don't play games, it's a serious relationship...a lot of people are too insecure to enter a serious relationship. Of course everyone involed loses...being used sucks!

Sorry Sarah, I'm German and to piss off in Germany means to go away without saying goodbye. In English it means to annoy someone so he leaves himself. So I though I can use it that way too.

Maybe you are right in saying that not playing games means to enter a serious relationship. I act that way, but I sometimes fantazise to have good limited relationship, where both sides want a certain degree of togetherness only.

Thank you for clearing up what you meant by "piss off".
Could you please expand more on what you mean when you say, "but I sometimes fantazise to have good limited relationship, where both sides want a certain degree of togetherness only." Togetherness as in the physical or emotional sense?

It's this possessing thing. I always like total togetherness in a emotional and physical sense, but I think this is spoiled by the togetherness in the economical sense. The economical things trigger a parent child relationship, which tends to repeat the same patterns as in the childhood. Possessing, teaching, suppressing.

What I like to have are two (or more) people meeting as adults, each one standing on their own, no need to interfere with each others lifestyle or control each other.

There is no need to control each others life, but I don't see any harm in supplementing each other finacially.
My bf and I give each other money all the time. Granted, he does have more resources than I, but that is one aspect of our relationship that is accepted. Neither of us feel supressed by this arrangement in any way.

So you are doing things right! I'm too on my way, but some problems have to be solved first.

sex between friends can work, but only if the sexual relationship is on a purely physical level, with mutual enjoyment thrown in. when either friend has an emotional attachment to the other, or the physical act is entered into without being totally up front about what is and is not going to happen, that is when you get problems.