h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi BB! Congratulations on your hovercraft article making front page!

Lost? No, I just noticed that several of the horses were gone, and asked Gandalf if he knew where you were...

Hello Titania!

Glad you could join us!

Shall we ride on across the stream?

C

Well met, Gandalf old fellow! Hallo Titania, glad you've caught up with us! Actually, if we hear galloping coming near us out of the woods, it will probably be Odradek. She's bringing a whole string of horses to the stable, and a couple of them are cross-country types.

*leads across the stream, ducks scattering with quacks of protest*
* the opposite bank climbs sharply*

'ginners, hang on to those neck straps till we get level! It's better for the horses for the rider's weight to be way up forward when they have to climb.

*as the riders crest the bank, the trail widenins and bright sunlight can be seen ahead*

Everybody halt when we get to the edge of the meadow -- we'll be galloping, and I want no runaways. mari-rae can do the honours. See that stand of beeches at the top of that gentle hill? Ride for that, full speed ahead! Everybody else count 4 then try to catch her -- I'll be behind y'all to make sure everybody gets to the beeches ok.

Its not going to be hard to catch us! LOL!!

*Taps her heels into Cookie and shifts her weight back down into the saddle.

Cookie lumbers into a slow canter and they head for the trees.*

*counting 1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - *

*waiting patiently...

*still waiting.... to give mari-rae and Cookie at least a chance*

4! Go Gandalf!

*Lil gives Benny a hand signal, and the bay veteran moves smoothly forward into a rocking horse canter, following Gandalf*

*Rimshot dances around in indignation, all his thoroughbred genes protesting at being left behind, but Lil holds him back as long as she can, all the better to enjoy the sprint*

Kathy shifts her weight forward in the saddle, standing in her stirrups, and Shamrock breaks into a smooth canter


You do stand when you canter in an English saddle, but not post, right? Posting is for trotting, isn't it?


C

*Gandalf slows down when he's alongside Cookie, as the gentle- eh - horse he is*

*Titania looks down on mari-rae* Hi there!

*Looks at Gandalf's expression of amusement at Cookie.*

Hello there! You may as well pass us.

Pass us - she's about to step over us!

<BB<

Posting is what yoou do to trot, right. But there's several ways to canter. Just lean forward a little bit!


*Lil finally relaxes her hands, which was all the signal Rimshot was waiting for. The gelding lunges forward, ears pricked forward and tries to gallop away, but Lil checks him into a ground-eating canter*

*Gandalf starts trotting zigzag, preventing Rimshot from passing the others*

That's OK -- he's not running away with me!
*under her breath* But I wish you'd stop trying, old fellow.

*fans off to the side a little bit, to where the hill is steeper, to make Rimshot do a little work*

*Cookie keeps slowing down to a trot.*

Come on, none of that.

*stands in the stirrups, shifts her weight back and persuades Rimshot to slow to a lope*

mari-rae, one way to get Cookie fit might be to make her jealous! Odra is bringing some smashing school horses to the yard and you can take one of them out across country when you feel the need for adrenalin!

Oh, I don't think Gandalf worried about you not being able to handle Rimshot Lil... I suspect he's trying to prevent a young hothead like that to win this - er - race.. thinking his ego is big enough as it is...

Canters along with the rest . . . too busy IRL to write creatively here CC

*pulls up, arriving at the treeline about the same time as Bluebottle on Benny and CC on Shamrock*

*In fact everybody gets to the treeline at more or less the same time, and Gandalf may actually have won by a very large nose*

Large nose? Hmmmph! Not in comparison with the rest of him...

*trying to figure out if a human scalp massage could be applied to a horse and his mane*

Look!!
*on the other side of the line of trees, pasture land sweeps down into a wide shallow sunlit valley. Dark forest takes up again on the other side, and another stream issues out of that wood and flows down to a small pond. Standing near the pond are shaggy dark brown creatures that look sort of like a cross between a buffalo and an antelope*

There are your gnus, Bluebottle!