h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ah - miss - don't go away - A word or two, if you please ...

Now then! What's all this I hear about Peac .... er, my wife and I being turned out of our suite at the end of the week? Hmm? Isn't our money good enough for this place? What's the idea? What sort of management gives someone the Bridal Suite for ahoneymoon, and then justs turfs people out without so much as a "by your leave"?

I don't care if it's not your fault .... and all that stuff about just doing your job. How d'you think we feel, eh?

I mean, it's just not good enough, is it? What sort of a feeble excuse has the owner got for wanting us out of the Bridal Suite?

And another thing - someone tried to put a camera into the room yesterday. Just not good enough. Hrrrmmmph!

*looks at kes warily*
can i help you, sir?

err... i was not aware of this, sir. perhaps you would like to speak with MK regarding the matter...

Yes, of course, I shouldn't take out my bad temper on you. I apologise. Yes - I should speak with the manager, and sort this out.
Thank you. I'll wait here ..... or if I wait too long - in the Bar!
Thank you.

* M.K looks over the notes Sea has supplied on a notepad... *

* He jots down the following... *

- Hunting party to Guesthouse No.2...

Must leave there guns in display cabinet in sitting room...

We have a local vicar who might be of some use as a 'dummy fox' with the right amount of vixen scent applied...

Don't worry if he comes to harm...

- Please allocate rooms for our new stablehands...

- Please relay to the couple in the Bridal Suite our displeasure at the excess amount of noise emanating from their room during 'imitate' moments....

Some other guests find it so offputting & hard to live up to...

- Please send the maid into my sleeping quarters to clear up before her ladyship comes home...

Thankyou.

Lord M.K*

*clatter of high heels
Breakfast is served in the dining room!
What's this?
A note from Lord M.K*?
Tidy up his room?
Ooh....I'll be right there!

* M.K wanders back in and places a vase with lovely autumn flowers in it... *

* with a note inscribed saying... *

Thankyou Sea,

Whenever I'm lost way out to Sea
As the waves crash onto distant shores
I hope you will find time to rescue me
Then I'll make sure, to give you what for...

Lord Byr...M.K*

Oh hunting sounds fun

Well if guns are involved I am in

If you are going hunting for JLC the TTP & her nephew, count me in. What is it with those people? Are they omnipotent?

Name?? Oh yes, registration, of course... I must have nodded off for a sec.

Name: Santragenius V
Title: Ambassador of Danevang (at least, that works well at the Damogran court)
Profession: Traveller, dog-fur ruffler, life-enjoyer
Young/Youngish/Young at Heart: Yes!
Male/Female: Male
Partner: I've got my dog with me -- oohh, not that sort of partner... In that case, yes please...

So all together, we're two. And if hunting's not appropriate, don't worry -- we'll just enjoy the countryside and see what -- and who -- we can find to enjoy ourselves with in a nice, lush green spot.

I'm terribly sorry Sir...

Our receptionist has a very loose interruptation of 'sevice'...

If you would be so kind as to follow me to Guesthouse no.2...

* M.K grabs the cases cursing Hezher in turn... *

Lord M.K*

*Kes returns, and reads MK's note*

Noises! What sort of an excuse for an eviction is that?

(After all, we've only been pre .... Hang on, brain ... check for sync here. If there have been noises, then I suppose ...)

Well, we still need somewhere to stay. WHere are we going to stay? Hmmmm?

I shall be waiting for an answer - you hear? Waiting .... in the Bar
Hrrrmmmph!

My dear Lord, I'm quite sure that the dear receptionist's service(s) can come (if I may say so) quite handy at the appropriate time...

Heel, Castor - let's go sample the guesthouses of this wonderful place.

Lord MK* (by the way, how do you pronounce the *?), do you think it's possible to have a pint of water and a pint of cold beer delivered to the room? Then I'll have the usual argument with my trusted companion here about who's supposed to be having what...

*Castor pants happily, already looking forward to the beer*

NO! Castor, the beer's for me, dogs drink water!

*Castor sulks*

*wakes up to find herself slumped in a chair in the recpetion area*

Must have nodded off...

*wanders off to find the stables, a bath, and somewhere to spend the night*

~A~

oh dear! must have nodded off there for a moment. sorry all. our new stablehand, pegasus, will be in room... 18 since there aren't any female staff members without a roommate. this way, pegasus. http://www.h2g2.com/F52250?thread=75991&latest=1 santragenius V and his dog will be in Guest House Two. this way, sirs. http://www.h2g2.com/F52250?thread=75992&latest=1

*strides confidently up to the reception, wearing rakish mini skirted dress, high heeled FMBs and sunglasses. Porter wheels in a number of matching luggage. Twirls handbag girlishly at the counter while ringing the bell for service*

*spots attractive young receptionist and leans forward conspiratorially*

Hi, I heard this is the place to meet people, if you know what I mean. I'm taking advantage of a weeks break, and need to unwind.

"receptionist winks back and indicates register*

Name: Tashalls
Title: Contessa (isn't it always the case that the aristocracy can get away with anything?)
Profession: Not with a title like this one...
Young: as they come
Female (obviously)
Partner: Any likely candidates?

*Enter kes, mind elsewhere*

Oh! Hello Tashalls! haven't seen you in ages ... the Aroma Cafe, wasn't it? Ancient Mariner.... Wednesday week ... all that?

How are you doing?

*Back to his main thought - check the room allocations*

Hmmph! Nothing for us here ... and the Bridal Suite is booked to MK from Friday. Poor show!