h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Computer:"State access code"]

ok computor. what is there that i can look at without having to use an acess code?

[Computer:"NOT A LOT. ARE YOU SURE YOU DON'T HAVE ONE?"]

Come on in the brig, we'll let you out when we have an access code for you.

Computer, state zem's attempt to sabotage as ignorance/stupidty please

[Computer:"UNABLE TO COMPLY"]


<<>>

ok, thanks!!

Computor, please show me the blue prints for the station and all information about the weapons. Access Code: Ark Angel Beta

[Computer:"That information is calssified"]

Don't even try, i have trouble seeing those plans and i am the weapons officer, the only time you will be able to see those is if Captain nuge and i give you clearence, it takes both of us, that's how important they are.

[Computer:"How about a colouring book instead, hmm? Call me Frankie."]

oh fine!

*leaves*

[Computer:"THANK YOU, WHATEVER DEITY THERE IS TO DO WITH AILING COMPUTER TERMINALS. PROCESSING BATTLE SCHEMATICS..."]

*Nuge walks in and runs a root system scan of the library computer. Several viruses are found, and Nuge quickly attempts to erradicate them from the system. These blips of code had manifested themselves as quasi-sentient AI programs, eating away at the computer core for some time. Nuge wipes the computer core, and runs a system restore from Clique HQ, returning it to its origional configuration. All command codes are reset, and the computer's personality is made less obnoxious <<>>*

[Computer: "RUNNING SYSTEM RESTORE... COMPLETE. READY FOR COMMANDS"]

Very good, computer. That will be all.

*Nuge leaves*