h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well if you've lost faith in god how about becomeing an avengeing angel at HTTP://WWW.H2G2.COM/A451649

Thats our site you know

Okay, finally worked out this is where to com to apply, after trying several times in the wrong places...

(Blimey, anyone would think I'm simple)



Now, I would love to be considered for GA status. If you need a Patron Saint name, I'd like to be Patron Saint of the Perfectly Normal...

Good for you, T. Don't worry if it takes Heaven a little while to respond - things are rather busy at the moment, and they usually gather several applications together, and then make them Saints in a batch ceremony (also good excuse for a party).

OK folks. I'd like to put in my ten cents' worth about GAs and AAs.

Running around with a scythe is probably satisfying, and does bring about instant results, but I vote for the slower, constructive approach. Most people here - especially newbies - need help, support and (sometimes) a bit of guarding more than anything else. I think this approach should apply even where the situation seems to warrant action with force.

A case study for us to think about: The Angels rescued Daniel from the lion's den. What method did they use?

"My Lord sent his Angel to shut the lion's mouth". Daniel 6:22 .

Not run a scythe through the beast ... just shut his mouth. Takes longer, but works better, IMHO.

(With apologies if I have offended anyone).

I have it on good authority that there will be a ceremony soon. Don't tell anybody...

Thanks Dan, I won't breathe a word ...

Me neither

*puts finger to side of nose, misses, then decides to cut back on Margaritas at lunchtime*

- just let me know if I'm invited...

is therer whisky involved?

or tequila?

There will be a party .... there's always a party, with champagne, whisky, tequila ... not always in the same glass.

Angels and about-to-be Angels, there will be a ceremony today.

*Kes rubs his hands in glee. A ceremony - continuity! Renewal! ... and a party! *

*He goes to work "prepping" the bar and the drinks trolley ... trying to remember the angels' (and new angels') favourite drinks.*

*Whistles cheerfully until threatened by Rasputin; then whistles very quietly*

Let's create a cocktail

"StrANGELy Normal"

tequila, champagne, shot of angostura. Dip rim of glass into lime juice, then sugar, pour mix into glass.

Yes!!

* Good morning everybody *

* Aha! Saint Kes. Wonderful idea. Where are my new Saints? *

St.Peter - Tashalls and Petunia are here...

*Kes puts the bottles down*

Yes ... right away ... They are both here ....they are ready.

*He leads Tashalls and Petunia forward.

Er, GOD .. we have two applicants, who wish to become Guardian Angels.

*The door bursts open, as Rasputin comes to observe. He seems to have had a couple of drinks already ... he wields his axe ... Kes turns to him*

Tovarish Rasputin! Shto za Chrot dyelayetye?

*Rasputing pauses, and apologises*

R: "Promintye, tovarish Kes, promintye vsye"

*Kes reassures the newcomers*

It's alright Petunia, Tash, he's quite calm now. We'll get on with it

* the shores of Lake Peaceful are calm this morning; the sunlight glinting and making the water shimmer with golden threads *
* the reflecting sunlight on the golden sword being carried by St.Titania the new Herald of Heaven *
* Archangel Tweetie smiles at the nervous new Angels-to-be *
* Archangel Fashion Cat adjusts their robes *

*Kes approaches Petunia, and whispers*

You will be first. Here - take my arm - we'll walk up toward GOD ... OK?

Right. Kneel here - on the cushion, and just wait. It'll go well. Alright?

*He stands and speaks up*

I present to you ... Petunia ... a guardee of Galaxy Babe, now wishing to play her part in helping others.

*Kes steps back to where tashalls is standing*