h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yes - if in every town where an oak tree was planted there was love, peace and prosperity (not to mention treehouses) all the world would be a happy place.

But surely you need a fish there too?

True

And a cheese...

And a Roasted Amoeba

I can't think of anything to say.

I can't blame you.

I blame you, KimotoCat.

(WHINE!)

Is that the red or the white?
I'll have a Lumrusco, 1963 please?

(VRÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆL!)
(TUUUUUUUUUD!)
(BRÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖL!)

(Snif)

KimotoCat, I have no idea what any of that meant, but it didn't sound good.

Can I help?

I could recommend a good counsellor.

I am truly a person of many qualities, some of wich are deviously dubious, but I am not scizophrenic, so I cannot cousel myself.
Even if I could, it would then have to be a real-world counselling as I live with me, and I charge far to much for that!

The words in the paranthesis were various interjective words suggesting crying desperately.

(SOB!)

Alternatively, you could go:
http://www.h2g2.com/p154405
for a counsellor.

I've tried and failed. What am I supposed to do?N Where am I supposed to go?

Now I am REALLY depressed!

There's a short list of places to go and things to do on my home page.
I'd be happy for you to come by...

Have you been down to my beach to cheer yourself up?

I can't find the beach! (BWAAAA!)

It's at:
http://www.h2g2.com/A208676
so you should find it easily enough.
Let me know what you think!