Knickers and vests and lumps o'coal

I am just only seven years old,

quiet as a mouse and not very bold,

but I have to say sumfing

'bout a stitchuation that makes my

mud run cold,

'bout them knickers and vests and lumps o' coal!



I tells you, I am not too much of an imp.

I never makes fun of them with a limp.

I makes up my bed, and I comb my head,

and I occashunalily fill my brother's diaper

with pencil lead, I know,

but that don't explain the

knickers and vests and lumps o'coal!



Me mum prattles and preaches 'bout 'havior,

whose supposed to be someone

that I'm supposed to be like.

If she likes this 'Havior so much,

why don't she adopt that tike?

Undt if they like him so,

then he can receive

them knickers and vests and lumps o'coal!