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6 cans Spam

1 dozen yard eggs

1 bag whole wheat flour

1 box brown sugar

1 bottle vanilla


Find clean large mixing bowl. Clean bucket will do. Find clean large spoon. Clean plastic toy beach shovel will do. Take above ingredients from packages (or not, but you'll have more lumps) and dump in bowl. Take spoon and beat mess into consistency or at least conformance. Find clean skillet or at least one that you have a memory of what was cooked in it last. Place skillet on stove burner (no chance of that being clean) and light fire (the burner's). Wet index finger and when it's dry pour mess in bowl into skillet, taking care not to overflow skillet. If you have too much for skillet, find another clean skillet and use it, too or take remainder of mess and place at back of first shelf in refrigerator for later ignorance. Cook mess in skillet until firm. Remove skillet from flame. Turn off burner. Scrape firm mess from skillet onto any plates you can find. Serve.

Cooking time:

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