Filing Cabinets
Created | Updated Nov 27, 2003
Filing cabinets come in just about all the colours under the sun. There are, incidentally, many colours in the visible spectrum but not all of them are under the sun at any one time.
Habitat
Filing cabinets live in many places. They are frequently found in workplaces: schools, offices, ice cream vans (there is photographic evidence of this)and they can, if pushed, inhabit human accomodation.
Diet
It is not well known that filing cabinets live on cutlery. Cabinets in Britain live solely on spoons. Their more exotic middle-eastern counterparts enjoy a rare delicacy known as 'the spork' while those rebellious Australain cabinets are downright peculiar and eat knives.
Social Habits
Filing cabinets are keen magicians. They have tricks to amaze and astound the viewer. They are real illusionists not just freaks that sit in a box for a few days and assume anybody cares. If anybody ever witnessed the rare sight of a magic show performed by a filing cabinet then they must count themselves very very fortunate indeed.
The final thing one should be aware of when dealing with the peaceful and calm life form that is the filing cabinet is that they do not care for red biros. This is one explanation for the age old mathematical problem about why teachers forbid anyone but themselves using red pens of the biroid variety. The teachers are so concerned the filing cabinets will, on seeing a red biro in the hand of a pupil, leap onto the unfortunate child and devour them whole that they do not allow red pens. Teachers are safe enough using these implements as they go on special training days on how to deal with rouge filing cabinets in their school. This Researcher was lucky enough to attend on of these workshops and that is why they are able to disclose what was once classified inforamtion.
