The following transmission was intercepted between two spies in contact over the radio. One spy is English, the other is American, and Jenkins is an assistant to the English spy.

Jenkins: Sir, we've just just had word from Agent Spiel with the CIA, I think you should come and listen to this.

English Spy: Oh, right. Thank you, Sergeant. (To radio microphone) Hot Mother this is Big Daddy, go ahead, over.

American Spy: I have Gingerbread Cottage in sight, but there's no sign of Wicked Witch or Hansel and Gretel, over.

ES: Good. Stand by, over.

AS: Ah. Hansel and Gretel are coming up to Gingerbread Cottage now... they have gone in, over.

ES: Ah, the trap is set. Let me know when they give the signal, over.

AS: (pause) Hansel and Gretel have given the signal, the Witch is in the oven. Repeat, the Witch is in the oven, over.

ES: (aside) Excellent. (to American Spy) Received, Hot Mother. Ensure that they neutralise Gingerbread Cottage, and then-

AS: (interrupting) Red Riding Hood is approaching Gingerbread Cottage, over.

ES: Oh Christ! She must have-

AS: (interrupting again) Mistaken it for Grandma's House, over.

ES: Exactly, over.

AS: But if Red Riding Hood delivers the basket of cakes to Gingerbread Cottage instead of Grandmas House, that means...

ES: Grandma starves! (aside) Jenkins, I think you'd better get the PM.

J: But sir, it's eight thirty.

ES: And??

J: Well it's Thursday sir, he'll be healing lepers out by yonder riverside.

ES: DAMN IT MAN I DON'T CARE, JUST GET HIM! (to American Spy) Big Daddy to Hot Mother, has Red Riding Hood merely gotten lost in Enchanted Forest or could she be a double agent? Over.

AS: Working for Wicked Queen?

ES: Hmmmm...

AS: Or worse, Evil Stepmother!

ES: We were under the impression Good-Hearted Woodcutter had assassinated Evil Stepmother.

AS: No, that was Big Bad Wolf.

ES: What, Big Bad Wolf assassinated Evil Stepmother, or Good-Hearted Woodcutter assassinated Big Bad Wolf?

AS: Eh?

ES: What happened to Hansel and Gretel?

AS: They are engaged in eating--sorry, neutralising Gingerbread Cottage.

ES: Has Red Riding Hood seen them yet?

AS: No, she's stopped and seems to be consuming the basket of cakes herself.

ES: Then she is working for the other side.

AS: I have line of sight, I could see to it that they are the last cakes she ever steals from the elderly.

ES: No, I have a better idea. Get your team out of there Hot Mother. We're sending in Old Mother Hubbard.

AS: The one with the cupboard??

ES: Yes, it's time to give the dog a bone.

AS: Roger, loud and clear. This old man is rolling home.