h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I mean to get noticed, as a supplement to the quetzocoatl-coat!

AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!(plop!)

Right!! Who's next?!?

Perhaps its just a coincidence but has anyone else noticed that it is imposible to score 2000 in a game of scrabble ?

Quetzalcoatl, which translates as "feathered serpent", was worshipped by the Mayans as a god of peace and later passed on to the Aztecs. He was also described as "a fair and ruddy complexioned man with a long beard"... "He came from across the sea in a boat that moved by itself without paddles" (see Heaven's Mirror by Graham Hancock). The god Quetzacoatl taught that only sacrifice of fruit and flowers was acceptable, he did not believe in vioence.

...and was obviously a vegitarian. Beware false gods and vegitarians, eat meat preflably grilled bacon on white bread. 'Oh mighty bacon sandwich we are not worthy'. I've been sitting here too long, when exactly does the year 2000 begin, surley some parts of the world will get it first, and the Austrailians last which means they'll known to switch everything off if it all goes pear shaped and the will survive and rule the world............G'day.

If January 1st , 2000 , is supposed to be Armageddon ,end of the world type stuff then what will happen if the question still hasnt been answered ?
Will the mice have to build a third Earth ?
Perhaps the Bible is actually an user manual for the mice , written in code , which has been badly translated by the resident homomsapien inhabitants .
Perhaps the " GOD " , revered by so many ppl with little to do on a sunday , is really a reference in the user manual for one of the workers of Magrathea ?
In any case when the clock ticks past midnight on the eve of the millenium there will be all eyes on our wee corner ( or should i say tangential radii ) of this suspended lump in space that we call home as we will be the first ones to welcome in ( or run screaming from ) the dawning of a new century . Providing of course that it has actually been here that long and its not a new thingy and we all have been fitted with mind implants so we think its as old as we percieve it to be.
Technically THIS earth is not 2000 yrs old as it is the replacement for the original . So , if the Vogons hadnt destroyed the first earth then yes , i would expect it to do all the forseen millenium things . But can one expect all these things considering that this is not the original . And if it still does destroy itself at the turn of the century , can the mice claim another under warranty ?
Anyway .
If youare still unsure about the consequences of the millenium turn over then just watch the news
If New Zealand suddenly go es "poof" then do the butt kissy thing and or go to the pub and drink heaps and eat lots of peanuts . With any luck Someone will manage to hitch a ride .

Somebody might be able to hitch a ride...all they have to do then is ask "Do you mind if I bring my friends along?", and then invite the whole of the population to come aboard!

Gosh, that was such an easy solution to armageddon - why has nobody thought of it before?

AndyF

Thats all very well if there happens to be somebody passing at the time. And even then they maybe on their way to a party in which case their transport may already full of drunken party goers, and all they'll do is laugh as they soak you as they drive through a large galactic puddle shouting " sorry mate!".

Which is why we should have been prepared and organised a lift out of here AGES ago! But no...someone decided that the computers were going to need all the attention and fixing and money. Very CyberDyne "T2" Systems if you ask me! The computers are planning to wipe us out...

Yeah it's probably that scary HAL-computer.
By the way have you noticed that if you shift all the letters in HAL one letter forward you get IBM.
Scary stuff!

The rumour that the initials HAL are 1 step away from IBM is something that should be discussed in the "Old Wives Tale" forum...!

Apparently Arthur C Clarke gets very annoyed if you ask him about it. He's been denying any link for almost 30 years now!


AndyF

Well, I heard (here we go again) that he wanted to use IBM but IBM wouldn't go along with it.

Yeah, but IBM doesn't spell an interesting name, besides no self respecting computer would be happy with a name like 'eyebim' would it now?

I think my brain just fell asleep.

WAKE UP!!


(Sorry. Couldn't resist that)
AndyF

No I want to sleep!

If the world does end on New Year's Day, it's a good enough excuse to have a great party on New Year's Eve as any. Last orders please.