h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

And as you know brutalizing prisoners is against the law in the New Republic is the Chancellor going to tell us that he 'fell down the stairs' a recording of these proceedures are being transmitted to the New Republic Amnesty International

~~Good point, but thin ice for contempt here~~

As you can see Senators, unless there is any cast iron evidence for actual crimes against the republic committed by me defendant, there is not basis for a conviction, and as all we have is a warning of a threat, I would like to say this trial can be brought to a close very quickly with the release or Mirig Gr'Jar.

We have not been shown any evidence of Gr'Jar crimes so far all we have is the Chancellors 'word', may I ask the members of the senate if anyone else has seen the proof of his guilt

KELLIN: I have here a transmission which-- In fact I'll put it on.

*fuzzy image of Gr'jar exiting the Red Star in the Shadow belonging to Veltebefore it turns back and retreats into the craft*

Obtained by a passing craft which caught this due to a probe in the area, does this not show Gr'jar leaving what looks like a Sith craft and then returning to it? Could he be escaping it? No. If so, then WHY would he return to it? Forget his lightsaber did he?

Clearly he is creating the appearance of Sith so that he can revolt against democracy!
Gr'jar shows no control over his apprentices.

Coruscant Security has shown Jedi leaving and returning to Coruscant these very past days. Bar Gr'jar on his initial visit, none of these ships have waited for permission to land.

CorSec has record of a craft that has BATTLE DROIDS on it!

*loud gasps*

So you do acknowlege the exsistance of the Sith after denying it during every coversation we've ever had with you (Transcripts are available to any member of the senate who wishes to see them). As for Master Mar'ol and his battle droids he does this with out authorisation from the Jedi council he is the one who should be imprisoned not Master Gr'Jar and I will see to it that he is brought before the council after these proceedings are brought to a close

Kellin: No, I say that Gr'jar is pretending to be Sith to create fear and dissention.

Gr'jar is responsible for all those whom he takes in at the Academy on Yavin IV.

If they do something wrong on mass then it is the fault of the teacher whom, with this jedi magic of yours, should have gotten rid of all the so-called darkside.

Of course I am saying to you whom is a known smuggler, and your accompplice who has been seen dealing death sticks!

*GASPS*

Hey, I don't deal, I smoke. All my supply is from Tatooine, where it is legal!

Kellin: But is illegal on Coruscant!

Well nobody told me, besides! I am not the one on trial. So far all we have is circumstantial evidence with regards to Gr'Jar. The only crime is that of Marrol bringing battle droids to Coruscant!
And was it not said, "I am not my brother's keeper?" meaning that Gr'Jar is not responsible for any unsanctioned actions Marrol makes!

Here here and I am not now nor have I ever been a member of the communist party................oops wrong speech to the wrong commitee, I mean I have never been a smuggler I used to be a mercenary and my records are available to the senate INCLUDING my prison records and as the 'Double Jepody' rules apply here I cannot be charged for a crime I have already been imprisoned for and anyway I am not on trial here and niether is the jedi order

Kellin: Gr'jar is responsible for all who train under him since he reformed the Jedi Order.

*Lots of 'Myes' *

Then surely by that logic Chancellor, you are in charge of all under you in the New Republic, which makes _you_ responsible for all Gr'Jar's actions!

*slight mumbles of "he has a point...*

The Chancellor has been accused in the past of twisting facts to further his own action an accusation made here in the senate by the Senator from Naboo and I again bring that charge to the Senate, Master Gr'Jar was visiting the Red Star to redeem a former Jedi Tobru De'Ran

You will be surprised Jedi, but we actually vote in decisions.

I have heard no accusation from naboo.

*looks at paper*

Ah yes, Tobru Deran. A rogue is she? Like many of those who have been under the tutorlidge of Gr'jar.

How many have fallen from this order... let's see...

Ah yes, five. Five rogue jedi since Gr'jar took lead of the Academy, the very same kind of jedi whom I have accused Gr'jar of becoming Dark Jedi re-enforcing that there. Are. No. Sith.

And you yourselves are a former smuggler and death stick dealer while outside in Coruscant there is another who has been seen exited and entering the city frequently with two BATTLE DROIDS. Battle droids which haven't been seen since before the Empire.

Gr'jar is your teacher. Gr'jar is your leader. Gr'jar is responsible and Gr'jar is the threat.

Firstly I do not deal Death Sticks anywhere in the galaxy, and secondly Gr'Jar is not responsible for the actions of his pupils any more than you are responsible for the actions of defectors from the Security Forces.

As we have pointed out, Co'bal has served time and is reformed, Marrol is acting on his own agenda and will be chastised by the order, and I do not deal anything!

Kellin: Deal in is not the same as dealing in.

If that is all you have to say, then the dvisory Council will give verdict.

Being the prosecutor I do not take judicary.

Actually Senator, my counterpart has a piece of information to show to the senate first.....

Kellin: Oh please show it. *grin*

<*GRIN!*>

Ok, now before you go accusing us of falsifying evidence I have shown this the the Justice Department and Mon Calimari, Naboo and the other members of the senate council and they have all verified it as true

*plays hologram*

*3 figures are seen in Kellin's office, one is Kellin, one Correllia and a Hooded Figure, the conversation goes as follows

Hooded Figure - Just make sure the Jedi never become as powerful as they were once

Correlia - How

HF - Discredit them, deny every request they ever make no matter how benign it seems, make sure the senators never trust their motives again

C - That should be easy enough

Kellin - A Master Gr'Jar is meeting us here shortly, I will see he is arrested and imprisoned, we should be able to twist history to suit ourselves

HF - So be it, you have served me well I will make sure you are well rewarded

*End Hologram*

Now we put it to you good people that the Chancellor not only knows of the exhistance of the Sith he is coluding with them to further his own ends, Gr'Jar is not guilty he has been set up by Chancellor Kellin as have all Jedi, I ask you to dismiss all charges against Gr'Jar and to charge Chancellor Kellin with treason and endangering the Republic.