Disabled people look at the world differently then the average everyday fully abled person, or at least thats my opinion. I should know I am one of them. When you are disabled you have more things that need to be looked at so at times you are more aware then most people.

Being in a small town, I think it is safe to say there may be even more to look at and I don't mean scenery. This wasn't something I had though much about when I moved to the town I live in, or maybe more accurately put am "stuck in".

One thing about smaller cities is the difference in how things are run as compared to larger cities when it comes to services for the disabled.

Smaller cities have less accessible transportation and that alone can be somthing that turns out to be huge, especially if you are who relys on the use of a wheelchair. The transportation they do have are unbelievably difficult for one to have access to unless your disability is that severe that you require around the clock care in a facility, or at least that is the case here.

I live in a city that gets more snow then most places as it is pretty far north (again something I learned once here). I'm not talking a little more. I mean the kind of more where the sidewalks are always burried and those that are brave enough and find themselves out there are up to their hips waiding in snow.

Needless to say I, with the aid of forearm crutches or canes am not going to be able to track through that to the bus stop and the disabled transportation says I'm "not disabled enough" to acquire their services.

In smaller cities you find that not all of the curbs are sloped so that one doesnt have to step down, and here it is so bad people in wheelchairs or travelling on scooter use the road using the sidewalk leaves them stuck as for crossing roads and continuing on their way.

The advantage with the streets in smaller cities is the length of the walk light is slightly more forgiving then in smaller cities and drivers aren't so anxious to get where they are going and allow one the time to completely pass and your not finding you have someone on your hiny as your trying to cross. Which I admit is something that makes me nervous about street crossings.

People's attitudes..and before I continue on this I feel I must add here I don't mean everyone..some of the most beautiful people I have ever met are themselves from smaller cities, and some of the most ignorant being from the big cities.

But you have to admit that the attitudes of people in smaller cities can be behind that of society.
But that is in not all their own fault. You see the problem with smaller cities is that they are behind the rest of society in the ways of development, growth and the changing of social attitudes or norms.

My religion proffessor at the university I attend once said that this sity is thirty years behind the rest of society. If this city can be that far behind I can only imagine how some of the other smaller cities are.

Disabled people are not seen out in the open, living their day to day life, going out and having fun just like everyone else as often in smaller cities as compared to the bigger cities. This of course is partially due to accessibility, but also due to the lack of programs to get the disabled out and active. This can lead to some "interesting" reactions.

Let me tell you a story.

One Saturday my girlfriend and I went to one of the local laundry mats, I had yet again let it all pile up and needed more then the one machine and more accessibility to the machine is always a good thing, allowing me to completely do my own laundry without assistance with carrying it all over the stairs.

Well things started as expected, the woman working the laundry mat was cleaning machines and saw me coming in assisted by a cane and ran to open the door.

Fine, maybe she was being polite. I decide to shug it off, allowing myself to think it was a gesture of politeness even though I wasnt the one carrying the laundry and was more then able to open doors.

We head over to the machines. I start piling laundry in, my girlfriend goes to get change for the machines giving me a minutes peace from the woman I know call "laundry lady" who had followed me over.

Machines full and running we decide to go shopping for a half hour, to amuse ourselves and to get away from the constant stares in my direction from the laundry lady. There is apparently nothing else in the almost empty mat to amuse her other then me.

30 minutes later we return and again I head to the door, and again it is opened for me.

I give up and think maybe I am just too sensitive about this, again shugging it off. But thats when the bombshell drops and laundry lady is in full swing.

I head to the machines, removing the clothes and putting them in the basket. Laundy lady runs over with the cart on wheels (for lack of an intelligent term that better descibes it at this point).

At this point I start thinking maybe I am not being over sensitive, maybe I just know before hand how this is going to end.
I end up taking the cart as she isnt going to take no for an answer.

I throw everyhing in to all of the carts, I am not thinking of folding I am thinking of going home now, before things get out of hand.

Done.

Everything is ready to go, the first loads in the car so I head out, girlfriend with the last load of laundy in tow when it happens.

Laundy Lady walks up beside her and saying how its good I am out and talking like my girl friend is my caregiver and is "letting me help HER do laundry".

When did I become invisible?

I look at the floor jet to the door, I am in the car before my girlfriend is even out of the mat.

Here this is a common occurance.

If I am shopping I am either followed by people thinking I can't handle myself and need help with everything or I am completely avoided like I am the next plague to hit, noticed long enough to get the usual looks of pity from fellow shoppers.

This isn't to say that this doesnt happen in the big cities, I will be the first to say that it very well does.

I have had elderly people clap at me when I walk by in residential area's. All I could think was "Do I clap at you cuz your doing something and your old? So dont clap at me cuz I am doing something and am disabled"

The advantage to the bigger cities is that it tends to be easier to change the attitudes of people about things like this where as it smaller cities people are more stuck to the things the way they are, its know as doing things "the old way".

At the same time it is nice to be able to have things to look at other then towering buildings when you are out for a walk, when you are able to get out anyway.

The one thing that living in a smaller city has taught me is a book should never be judged by its cover. I think its safe to say that I think more about things I am going to say before I say them, thinking about how someone might feel since I know all to much about this.

I make sure to acknowledge people in my presence, not talking around them or making them seem suddenly "invisible".

The main important thing this has taught me is that we are ALL people, disabled or not.

And like it or not I am going to continue living my life despite people's reactions. Hopefully the more people are exposed to peole and their various differences, ignorance will becoming something of the past.

Life is to be lived, not for another but for ourselves. Get out have fun and the next time you see you see someone disabled say hello and give them a smile, you never know they could be your next best friend and even teach you a thing or two.