Chain Story - The Adventures of Clarence
Created | Updated Nov 22, 2015
Chapter Four - The Land of the Ending
...He was London Transported by bus without a 'may I' or a 'by your leave' to the Land of The Ending (otherwise known as End-Land or Land's-End), where, if you stood on tiptoe and looked West across the sea, beyond England, you could almost convince yourself you could see the outline of America...
...The Easter Bunny was there, too — in the other direction towards land, of course, but she could only just be seen. Only her ears were showing above the snow, which was already melting in the spring sunshine...
...'It isn't Easter yet, but I could have sworn I saw an egg,' said Winnie the Peg (no relation) from the wild woods of Canada. She'd stopped being Clarence's cross mother-in-law when she found out her only daughter had been out shopping all the time. Anyway she was married to someone else entirely...
...'There’s loads of yummy chocolate Easter eggs here,' she squealed, her happiness knowing no bounds. 'How can that be, because I could've sworn that...'
...There was a lot of swearing going on. It got worse...
The giant, shouting clowns and the brass bands playing selections from Jesus Christ Superstar while very drunk and out of tune probably didn't help the mood.
Gradually, everyone congregated to the small shed at the bottom of the garden...
...But not before Clarence had made daisy chains for them all and had eaten his first Walnut Whip...
...Then the world outside began to disappear and the shed transformed itself magically into yet another infinite dimension where everyone was free and everything was good and there was no need for arguments or fighting or war or poverty, where everyone got on well and Chelsea never won the Football Premiership ever again...
...There were yummy chocolate eggs and Walnut Whips for everyone. This was largely thanks to the little deus ex machina whom Clarence had found resting in the washing machine after working so hard throughout this story and had made firm friends with.
...and so they all lived super-coolly and hoopily ever after. I mean really mind-bogglingly super-coolly and hoopily. I mean so mind-bogglingly super-coolly and hoopily that you couldn't even begin to imagine...
